Jokes Collection
Enjoy our collection of over 100,000 jokes. Find humor for every occasion and share laughs with friends and family.
Latest Jokes
...wondering how they will get across. The first one decides to pray saying "God please make me smart enough to get across this river." so God turns her into a brunette and she swims across the river. The second also prays saying "Dear God, please make me twice as smart as the last girl so I can get across this river." So God turns her into a red head and she builds a boat and rows across the river. The third also prays "Dear God, please make me twice as smart as both of those women combined." So God turns her into a man and she walks across the bridge.
The king is bored and says to the three men, if you want to live, you have to bring me 10 fruit of the same kind. The first man comes back with bananas. The king says to stick all 10 bananas up his butt and if he succeeds, the king will not kill him. The man gets 7 up and then he says he can't do it anymore. The king then kills him. The next man comes back with 10 grapes. The king says to put all the grapes up his butt. So he starts and the man is almost there, he has 9 grapes and then he burst out laughing and everything comes back out. The king kills him too. In heaven, the first man ask the second man why he was laughing when he was almost there. The second man says because he saw the next man coming up with pineapples!
Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Your mom.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Your mom.
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead all work for a female boss who always goes home early.
"Hey girls," says the brunette. "Let's go home early tomorrow. She'll never know."
So the next day, they all leave right after their boss. The brunette gets some extra gardening done, the redhead goes to a bar, and the blonde goes home to find her husband having sex with the female boss. She quietly sneaks out of the house and returns at her normal time.
"That was fun," says the brunette. "We should do it again sometime."
"No way," says the blonde. "I almost got caught."
"Hey girls," says the brunette. "Let's go home early tomorrow. She'll never know."
So the next day, they all leave right after their boss. The brunette gets some extra gardening done, the redhead goes to a bar, and the blonde goes home to find her husband having sex with the female boss. She quietly sneaks out of the house and returns at her normal time.
"That was fun," says the brunette. "We should do it again sometime."
"No way," says the blonde. "I almost got caught."
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