Jokes Collection
Enjoy our collection of over 100,000 jokes. Find humor for every occasion and share laughs with friends and family.
Latest Jokes
The governor has a dilemma: where to take the asphalt for roads, to ride a Porsche, which on the waybills is asphalt.
Poroshenko made a tattoo on his belly with a map of Ukraine, and with every day of his presidency the territory of Ukraine only grows.
Patient to the doctor:
- I feel broken and shabby like a deck of cards.
- Let me shuffle you.
- In terms of?!
- Massage ...
- I feel broken and shabby like a deck of cards.
- Let me shuffle you.
- In terms of?!
- Massage ...
People's sign: if Putin is tapped on TV with his naked torso, then soon presidential elections!
Deal with the devil as a loan - first you receive, you give then.
Deal with God as a pension - you give your whole life, then, perhaps, you get it, but it's not certain.
Deal with God as a pension - you give your whole life, then, perhaps, you get it, but it's not certain.
Advertising of a Florida company:
"We prefer to deal with thousands of Arab terrorists, rather than with one Jew."
Company name: "The funeral bureau Goldberg".
"We prefer to deal with thousands of Arab terrorists, rather than with one Jew."
Company name: "The funeral bureau Goldberg".
Once at breakfast, the wife says to her husband:
- You spoke in a dream last night.
- I hope I did not interrupt you?
- You spoke in a dream last night.
- I hope I did not interrupt you?
A passenger suffering from seasickness asks the captain:
- Tell me, is there a land ahead?
- No, the horizon.
-Thank God it's better than nothing!
- Tell me, is there a land ahead?
- No, the horizon.
-Thank God it's better than nothing!
- Here, bro, we congratulate you on your birthday and give this bit here.
- Yes, I did not want a bat, I have not yet chosen a gift ...
- Bro, take a bat, go outside and choose any gift for yourself!
- Yes, I did not want a bat, I have not yet chosen a gift ...
- Bro, take a bat, go outside and choose any gift for yourself!
- Why do you hire only married men?
- Because they are accustomed to insults and do not hurry home at the end of the day.
- Because they are accustomed to insults and do not hurry home at the end of the day.
Are you tired of thieves in power? Do you want to drive them away and change them to other thieves? Or maybe you miss the civil war? Do you want to reduce the average salary by 3 times? Or in your life there is not enough cookies?
There is a way out - build the Maidan! (Recommended by the US Department of State)
There is a way out - build the Maidan! (Recommended by the US Department of State)
In Japan, the government was fucked up and resigned in full.
In Russia, the government has screwed up and raised its salary twice.
In Russia, the government has screwed up and raised its salary twice.
In the beginning were the watch of the Patriarch. Then there were the watch of Peskov and the wedding on the expensive yacht. Then there was the plane and the dogs of Shuvalov, the yacht of Sechin and a billion Roldugin. Then there was Medvedev's duck. And now, there was the wedding of Khakhaleva. All this was ...
But, none of them, get nothing for what!
But, none of them, get nothing for what!
Everyone has his own ideas about equality. Some believe that equality is when everyone at the same time comes to the finish line, others - when everyone starts at the same time from the starting line.
My mother-in-law talks so much that, when she rests on the sea, she even has glands covered with sunburn.
A man comes one day earlier from a business trip, and catched at home his wife's lover with some unknown woman.
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