Jokes Collection
Enjoy our collection of over 100,000 jokes. Find humor for every occasion and share laughs with friends and family.
Latest Jokes
Two gay deer walk out of a gay deer bar. One says to the other, "I had a great time in there, you?" The other deer responds, "Yeah, but I blew about 20 bucks."
But whenever I pay hackers to unlock an iPhone, I'm "too insecure to be in a relationship".
A young man passing by decides to help:
"What's wrong?" said the young man.
"Well... it's just that I... I'm in love with a 22 year old." said the old man.
"I see, and she doesn't correspond?" said the young man.
"Actually, we are married. The problem is that every day after I wake up in the morning, we have wild sex. Then she leaves for work" the old man said.
"That's not bad," the young man said.
"Well, when she gets home, she makes my meal and gives me a blow job. After we eat, we have more wild sex." the old man said.
"If you are having sex all day, then why so glum?" the young man said.
"The problem is I forgot where I Fucking live!"
"What's wrong?" said the young man.
"Well... it's just that I... I'm in love with a 22 year old." said the old man.
"I see, and she doesn't correspond?" said the young man.
"Actually, we are married. The problem is that every day after I wake up in the morning, we have wild sex. Then she leaves for work" the old man said.
"That's not bad," the young man said.
"Well, when she gets home, she makes my meal and gives me a blow job. After we eat, we have more wild sex." the old man said.
"If you are having sex all day, then why so glum?" the young man said.
"The problem is I forgot where I Fucking live!"
... surprisingly the store has one for sale. But the assistant warns the man:
"Do never, under any circumstances, tickle the bear behind the ears."
Of course, the man buys the bear and cheerfully takes it home. After a while he can't help the urge any more and tickles the bear behind the ears.
With a wild roar the polar bear lunges at the man, who runs away in great fear. The bear chases him through the whole house, down the stairs, into the kitchen and around the table, where he finally catches up to the man, pats him on the back and says: "Tag, you're it!"
[read in a German children's educational book and translated for you, /r/jokes]
"Do never, under any circumstances, tickle the bear behind the ears."
Of course, the man buys the bear and cheerfully takes it home. After a while he can't help the urge any more and tickles the bear behind the ears.
With a wild roar the polar bear lunges at the man, who runs away in great fear. The bear chases him through the whole house, down the stairs, into the kitchen and around the table, where he finally catches up to the man, pats him on the back and says: "Tag, you're it!"
[read in a German children's educational book and translated for you, /r/jokes]
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