Jokes Collection
Enjoy our collection of over 100,000 jokes. Find humor for every occasion and share laughs with friends and family.
Featured Joke
A guy stands over his tee shot for what seems an eternity: looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. Finally his exasperated partner says, "What's taking so long? Hit the damn ball!"
The guy answers, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot."
"Forget it, man," says his partner. "You'll never hit her from here."
The guy answers, "My wife is up there watching me from the clubhouse. I want to make this a perfect shot."
"Forget it, man," says his partner. "You'll never hit her from here."
Latest Jokes
Honey, if you have any problems, you can write to me at any time and I will immediately find you a comforting meme.
- John, does your wife love you?
- At first she does, but later on nature took its toll.
- At first she does, but later on nature took its toll.
Imagination works differently for all people. And usually the biggest difference is between the imagination of the customer and the imagination of the performer.
- Disaster! Thanksgiving in a week, and our store shelves are empty!
- Everything is fine. It's just that Sleepy Joe sleepily pardoned all the turkeys at once.
- Everything is fine. It's just that Sleepy Joe sleepily pardoned all the turkeys at once.
That's why I love my wife, it's honesty. You ask her - Do you think I'm a complete asshole? - answers - Yes, of course ... But she could have lied ...
At the reception, the doctor diagnoses the patient: amnesia
- Excuse me, doctor, but what is "amnesia"?
- I do not remember...
- Excuse me, doctor, but what is "amnesia"?
- I do not remember...
- This Biden is so cool: he blew up a firecracker right at the climate summit.
- It was not a firecracker.
- It was not a firecracker.
The same bottle of water costs 20 cents in the supermarket, 50 cents in the gym, 1 euro in the bar, 3 euros on the plane. It is all depends on the place in which they need it.
Therefore, when it seems to you that you are worthless and priceless, then you are in the wrong place.
Therefore, when it seems to you that you are worthless and priceless, then you are in the wrong place.
A pair of domestic black cats and a cat are always unlucky, because they constantly cross each other's path.
Representatives of the indigenous population of America, in the framework of restoring historical justice and combating the legacy of a dark past, demanded to limit the use of English as the language of the aggressor country and rename English-speaking settlements in accordance with national tradition.
- My husband says he had the best in world mother-in-law.
- How could he have said otherwise? He's not immortal ...
- How could he have said otherwise? He's not immortal ...
The Ukrainian authorities have found a replacement for Russian gas - these are powerful exhausts of old Joe Biden!
Snow White in the morning with a hangover in front of a talking mirror:
- Shut up, I just comb your hair!
- Shut up, I just comb your hair!
London. A man is sitting with a stick and a rope on the banks of the Thames.
The artsy English policeman approaches:
- Sir, would you like to quit your fishing business?
The man looks around in surprise, shrugs his shoulders
- I don't.
- Sir, what kind of stick and rope you have, lowered into the Thames, sir?
- And this?
A man picks up a stick and a rope. a severed human hand is tied at the end.
Policeman:
- Oh, I see that you are a tourist from St. Petersburg?
The artsy English policeman approaches:
- Sir, would you like to quit your fishing business?
The man looks around in surprise, shrugs his shoulders
- I don't.
- Sir, what kind of stick and rope you have, lowered into the Thames, sir?
- And this?
A man picks up a stick and a rope. a severed human hand is tied at the end.
Policeman:
- Oh, I see that you are a tourist from St. Petersburg?
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