Jokes Collection
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Latest Jokes
The seventh package of sanctions will be entirely made up of stories about how bad life will be for the Russians under the eighth package of sanctions.
Russian missiles, which will soon be installed in Nicaragua and Venezuela, will not be directed against the US, they only serve to combat maritime piracy in Mongolia.
Why are Nobel Prizes awarded for discoveries half a century ago, and Oscars for modern shit, and not for masterpieces of the 60s?
Zelensky was named the most influential person of the year according to Time magazine. I'm sitting watching Zelensky's video, where he, the most "influential person", asks other "influential people" from the same list to help him resolve the issue with a person who is not on this list.
The Ministry of Health of Russia reports that not a single case of monkeypox has been registered in Russia, since all potential carriers have left for Israel.
In Ukraine, it is necessary to strike not at the decision-making centers, but at the center of drug acceptance.
We have to hear that the logistics for the delivery of Western weapons to Ukraine are very lame. Well, I don't know, I don't know... In any case, the logistics for the delivery of these weapons from Ukraine to Africa works like a Swiss watch.
The tenth package of EU sanctions came into force. The residences of Macron and Scholz are heated with firewood.
Will Israel sell the Iron Dome system to Ukraine?
Yes, they going to Sell, then buy and sell again, but more expensive.
Yes, they going to Sell, then buy and sell again, but more expensive.
I don't understand why Ukraine and the West are worried. Russia and Donbass are an exclusively defensive alliance. There is no reason to worry even if this alliance starts to expand.
Little by little it became obvious that we are participants not in the Third World War, but in the continuation of the Great Patriotic War. The only difference is that the former allies went over to the side of the enemy.
The State Department said that the United States is ready "if necessary" to launch military strikes to contain Iran.
Wow, now the "free world" will be indignant!
I can already see Josep Borrell writing an angry tweet about American aggression, and Ursula von der Leyen calling for an embargo on American oil.
FIFA is expelling the US soccer team, the IOC is banning disabled Americans from the Olympics, and McDonald's is closing its restaurants across the US.
Wow, now the "free world" will be indignant!
I can already see Josep Borrell writing an angry tweet about American aggression, and Ursula von der Leyen calling for an embargo on American oil.
FIFA is expelling the US soccer team, the IOC is banning disabled Americans from the Olympics, and McDonald's is closing its restaurants across the US.
In fact, Vladimir Zelensky is, without exaggeration, a titan. He alone did to his country what the "best German" Gorbachev and "God bless America" Yeltsin together did to the USSR.
"In our state, fuel is so expensive that it's easier to buy cocaine and just run around," said US Senator John Kennedy from Louisiana.
This turn, Putin did not expect!
This turn, Putin did not expect!
I thought for a long time - who does Joe Biden remind me of?
Finally remembered! In our village there was an old hornless goat Dementy.
Finally remembered! In our village there was an old hornless goat Dementy.
Maloney, head of the US House Oversight Committee, said "the gun industry makes billions of dollars selling weapons that kill children" and that "it's time to rid our streets and homes of assault rifles."
For example, sending them to Ukraine.
For example, sending them to Ukraine.
In connection with the latest events in Europe, it's time for them to remake the Russian proverb to "The further you climb, the more firewood!"
Arestovich: If they don't give us rockets, we'll throw a model tantrum.
Biden interpreter: If we don't send rockets, he threatens to shit in your bed.
Biden interpreter: If we don't send rockets, he threatens to shit in your bed.
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