Jokes Collection

Enjoy our collection of over 100,000 jokes. Find humor for every occasion and share laughs with friends and family.

Featured Joke

A recent survey conducted asked about a thousand 13-year old gamers what they had done last week.

92% said "your mum"
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Latest Jokes

What is red and goes putt, putt, putt?
An
outboard apple.
Added: Jan 1, 2018
How does an apple a day keep the doctor
away?

When you take careful aim.
Added: Jan 1, 2018
How do you
make an apple puff?
Chase it
round the garden
Added: Jan 1, 2018
School lunches are not generally popular with

those that have to eat them, and sometimes with good reason.
"What
kind of pie do you call this ?" asked one schoolboy

indignantly.
"What's it taste of ?" asked the cook.
"Glue!"
"Then it's
apple pie, the plum pie tastes of soap."
Added: Jan 1, 2018
Fred came rushing in to his Dad. "Dad!" he
puffed,
"is it true that an apple a day keeps the doctor away?"

"That's what they say," said his Dad.
"Well, give me an apple quick ?
I've just broken the doctor's
window!"
Added: Jan 1, 2018
How do you get the most apples at Halloween?

Take a snorkel.
Added: Jan 1, 2018
Two boys were eating a snack lunch in the school
yard. One
had an apple and the other said, "Watch out for worms
won't you!" The
first one replied, "Why should I? They can watch out
for
themselves."
Added: Jan 1, 2018
The first commandment was when Eve told Adam to
eat
the apple.
Added: Jan 1, 2018
What do you get if you cross an apple with a

shellfish?
A crab apple !
Added: Jan 1, 2018
Where do ants go to eat ?
At a restaurant !
Added: Jan 1, 2018
What do you call an ant from overseas
?
Impartant
Added: Jan 1, 2018
What kind of ant is good at maths ?
An
accountant !
Added: Jan 1, 2018
What do you call a greedy ant ?
An anteater !
Added: Jan 1, 2018
What medicine would you give an ill ant
?
Antibiotics !
Added: Jan 1, 2018
What do you call an ant who lives with your great

uncle ?
Your great-ant !
Added: Jan 1, 2018
How many ants are needed to fill an apartment
?
Ten ants !
Added: Jan 1, 2018
What is even bigger than an elephant ?
A giant
!
Added: Jan 1, 2018
Who was the most famous ant scientist ?
Albert
Antstein !
Added: Jan 1, 2018
What kind of ants are very learned ?
Pedants
!
Added: Jan 1, 2018
What do you call a smart ant ?
Elegant !
Added: Jan 1, 2018

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