Rush Limbaugh

I have found it to be true that the older I've become the better my life has become.

Between 1965 (the beginning of LBJ's \'Great Society\') and 1994, welfare spending has cost the taxpayers $5.4 trillion in constant 1993 dollars. The War on Poverty has cost us 70 % more than the total price tag for defeating both Germany and Japan in World War II, after adjusting for inflation. Many believe that Welfare has destroyed millions of families and cost a huge portion of our national wealth in the process.

The only way to reduce the number of nuclear weapons is to use them.

We live in a world of intolerance masked as tolerance.

This is so classic. Government comes along under the guise of fairness, fixes something, gonna make it fair, gonna make it equal, gonna make it affordable, maybe even make it free. What they end up doing is blowing it all to hell, screwing it up worse than it's ever been screwed up, then their voters bellyache and complain about it. And the same Democrats come back and demand that something be done, because their voters need a second chance.

Well, Rush, look what happened? 9/11 happened, and we didn't know it in advance. That's right, we got hit, we got hit big time. We need a new agency to make sure it doesn't happen again, Rush.\' And that was the excuse for starting Department of Homeland Security. The government grows and grows and grows and grows, and what do we get? Little old ladies wanded, scanned for bombs and weapons under their skirts next to the incontinence diapers. A bunch safer.

So I shamelessly say, no, I want [Obama] to fail, if his agenda is a far-left collectivism, some people say socialism, as a conservative heartfelt, deeply, why would I want socialism to succeed?

So, Ms. Fluke and the rest of you feminazis, here's the deal: If we are going to pay for you to have sex, we want something for it, and I'll tell you what it is -- we want you to post the videos online so we can all watch.

The real issue, as far as Democrats are concerned, is the number of people receiving something from the government. This is exactly what Franklin Delano Roosevelt had in mind when he created this monster. And Clinton is planning to expand it beyond Roosevelt's wildest dreams.

Net neutrality would require that every search engine produce an equal number of results that satisfy every disagreement about [every] issue.... Just think of it as Fairness Doctrine for the Internet. I'm not making this up.

The vast majority of the rich in this country did not inherit their wealth; they earned it. They are the country's achievers, producers, and job creators.

The culture war is between the winners and those who think they're losers who want to become winners. The losers think the only way they can become winners is by banding together all the losers and them empowering a leader of the losers to make things right for them.

I'm all for education. Education ideally happens every moment of the day for people. Education is something that should never stop. The Limbaugh Institute, there are no graduates and no degrees 'cause the learning never stops here. You know, education's a pretty big umbrella.

It's about panic. It's about fear. It's about instilling the American populace with terror, dread, and apprehension about the future. It's all about making you think that your way of life is \'destroying the world.\' America is the root of all evil in the world, according to the environmentalist wackos. You, the citizens of the United States, are ruining everything.

How many of you guys, in your own experience with women, have learned that \'no\' means \'yes\' if you know how to spot it? Let me tell you something. In this modern world, that is simply not tolerated. People aren't even gonna try to understand that one. I mean, it used to be said it was a clichГ©. It used to be part of the advice young boys were given.

We need to shut down this Gitmo prison? Well, don't shut it down -- we just need to start an advertising campaign. We need to call it, \'Gitmo, the Muslim resort.\' Any resort that treated people like this would have ads all over the New York Times trying to get people to come down and visit for some R&R, for some rest and relaxation.

There isn't a single government agency that can't function. There's more money in this federal government, there's more money allocated than these people can possibly spend. They have to concoct asinine ways to spend it, like advertising for new food stamp users. I've gotten to the point, I'm just so righteously indignant and offended at the very idea that our government could ever run out of money when we've got a printing press, for crying out loud. Printed three and a half trillion dollars over seven years and flood

You know I have always tried to be honest with you and open about my life, so I need to tell you that part of what you have heard and read is correct. I am addicted to prescription pain medication.

There's one reason why [Presidents' Day] is a holiday. It had nothing to do with our country deciding that we wanted to show reverence for our presidents, Lincoln, Washington, or all of them. Nothing to do with that. The ski industry wanted a three-day weekend.

I've never run across anybody who suggested that women need to be reprogrammed. I don't think I've even come across anybody who wanted to teach a girl how to throw right. They just accept it is what it is. But honestly, folks, it's always reprogramming men. It's always men who seem to provide or be at the root of all of these cultural problems. And if we could just make men less like men and more like, I guess, women, then we would be rid of all of these problems.

The most beautiful thing about a tree is what you do with it after you cut it down.

I'm not going to assume liberals are stupid, as they do with conservatives. No, I'll attribute it instead to more fraud and deceit.

Greetings, conversationalists across the fruited plain, this is Rush Limbaugh, the most dangerous man in America, with the largest hypothalamus in North America, serving humanity simply by opening my mouth, destined for my own wing in the Museum of Broadcasting, executing everything I do flawlessly with zero mistakes, doing this show with half my brain tied behind my back just to make it fair because I have talent on loan from ... God. Rush Limbaugh. A man. A legend. A way of life.

As far as feminism is concerned ... the problem in the world is men, and they, in their natural state, are essentially incompatible. They must be tamed. They must be tempered, 'cause men are naturally brutes. They fight. They sweat. They expel gas. They're dirty. They get into fights. Ewww! And we've got to somehow reprogram all of that out, because otherwise women will be in constant peril.

Now, what is the left's worldview in general? What is it? If you had to attach not a philosophy but an attitude to a leftist worldview, it's one of pessimism and darkness, sadness. They're never happy, are they? They're always angry about something. No matter what they get, they're always angry.

The last thing in the world someone should do is respond to critics. If I did that I'd be neutered by now--I would be in the nearest insane asylum wearing 15 straitjackets. My whole career has been nothing but: \'You shouldn't do it that way, you bigot, you sexist, you homophobe, you pig, you right-wing warmonger, you whatever.

The only way liberals win national elections is by pretending they're not liberals.

The Eighties proved we don't need liberals.

Feminazis have adopted abortion as a kind of sacrament for their religion/politics of alienation and bitterness.

The danger with mentioning names is that you hurt the feelings of people that you leave out.