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Pedro: Yes. I don't understand... they say you're not allowed to have pinatas that look like real people, but in Mexico, we do it all the time. (Ace Goodman) Napoleon Dynamite: A liger. Deb: What's a liger? Napoleon Dynamite: It's pretty much my favorite animal. It's like a lion and a tiger mixed... bred for its skills in magic. (Ace Goodman) | |
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Pedro: It's a sledgehammer. Napoleon Dynamite: Dang! You got shocks, pegs... lucky! You ever take it off any sweet jumps? Napoleon Dynamite: [Cut to Pedro jumping] You got like three feet of air that time. (Ace Goodman) Napoleon Dynamite: The worst day of my life, what do you think? (Ace Goodman) Kip: Well, things are getting pretty serious right now. I mean, we chat online for, like, two hours every day so I guess you could say things are gettin' pretty serious. (Ace Goodman) Pedro: It looks nice. Napoleon Dynamite: Yeah, it looks pretty sweet. It looks awesome. That suit, it's... it's incredible. (Ace Goodman) Pedro: A couple of days. (Ace Goodman) [Through gritted teeth] Trisha: It's hanging in my *bedroom*. Napoleon Dynamite: Really? It took me like three hours to finish the shading on your upper lip. It's probably the best drawing I've ever done. (Ace Goodman) Napoleon Dynamite: Heck yes! I'd vote for you. Pedro: Like what are my skills? Napoleon Dynamite: Well, you have a sweet bike. And you're really good at hooking up with chicks. Plus you're like the only guy at school who has a mustache. (Ace Goodman) Farmer: Do they have what? Napoleon Dynamite: Large talons. Farmer: I don't understand a word you just said. (Ace Goodman) Napoleon Dynamite: I already made like infinity of those at scout camp. (Ace Goodman) Napoleon Dynamite: I told you! I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines! Don: Did you shoot any? Napoleon Dynamite: Yes, like 50 of 'em! They kept trying to attack my cousins, what the heck would you do in a situation like that? Don: What kind of gun did you use? Napoleon Dynamite: A freakin' 12-gauge, what do you think? (Ace Goodman) [points to Kip] Rex: Take a look at what I'm wearing, people. You think anybody wants a roundhouse kick to the face while I'm wearing these bad boys? Forget about it. Last off, my students will learn about self respect. You think anybody thinks I'm a failure because I go home to Starla at night? Forget about it! (Ace Goodman) Kip: It's pretty cool, I guess. Uncle Rico: Ohhhh, man I wish I could go back in time. I'd take state. Napoleon Dynamite: This is pretty much the worst video ever made. Kip: Napoleon, like anyone can even know that. Uncle Rico: You know what, Napoleon? You can leave. Napoleon Dynamite: You guys are retarded! (Ace Goodman) Kip: Napoleon, don't be jealous that I've been chatting online with babes all day. Besides, we both know that I'm training to be a cage fighter. Napoleon Dynamite: Since when, Kip? You have the worst reflexes of all time. Kip: Try and hit me, Napoleon. Napoleon Dynamite: What? Kip: I said come down here and see what happens if you try and hit me. (Ace Goodman) Uncle Rico: She didn't tell me anything. Napoleon Dynamite: Too bad, she said she doesn't want you here when she gets back because you've been ruining everybody's lives and eating all our steak. Uncle Rico: I'm not goin' anywhere, Napoleon. Napoleon Dynamite: Get off my property! Uncle Rico: It's a free country. I can do whatever I want. Napoleon Dynamite: Get off my property or I'll call the cops on you. Uncle Rico: Well then do it! Go on! Napoleon Dynamite: Maybe I will, GOSH! (Ace Goodman) Trisha: Yeah... it's really... neat. (Ace Goodman) | |
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