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Shrek: Uh, no. Princess Fiona: Why not? Shrek: I have helmet hair. Princess Fiona: Please. I would'st look upon the face of my rescuer. Shrek: Oh, no, you wouldn't... tst. Princess Fiona: But... how will you kiss me? Shrek: What? That wasn't in the job description. The Donkey: Maybe it's a perk. (Ace Goodman) Princess Fiona: It talks. Shrek: Yeah, but it's getting him to shut up that's the trick. (Ace Goodman) Shrek: One of a kind. (Ace Goodman) | |
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Shrek: It's on my "to do" list. Now come on. Princess Fiona: But this isn't right. You're meant to charge in, sword drawn, banner flying-that's what all the other knights did. Shrek: Yeah, right before they burst into flame. (Ace Goodman) Shrek: You've had a lot of time to plan this, haven't you? (Ace Goodman) Donkey: Stairs? I thought we was lookin' for the Princess. Shrek: The Princess will be up the stairs in the highest room in the tallest tower. Donkey: How do you know that? Shrek: I read it in a book once. (Ace Goodman) Shrek: In the tower, waiting for us to rescue her. Donkey: I was talkin' about the dragon, Shrek. (Ace Goodman) Shrek: Oh, aye? Donkey: Well, donkeys don't have no layers. We wear our fear right there on our sleeves. Shrek: But Donkey, donkeys don't wear sleeves. Donkey: You know what I mean. Shrek: You can't tell me you're afraid of heights? Donkey: No, I'm just uncomfortable about being on a rickety bridge, over a *boiling lake of lava*. (Ace Goodman) Shrek: Donkey, if that was me, you'd be dead. That's brimstone... we must be getting close Donkey: Yeah, right, brimstone, don't be talking about no brimstone. I know what I smelt and it wasn't no brimstone and it didn't come off no stone neither. (Ace Goodman) Donkey: They stink? Shrek: Yes. No. Donkey: Oh, they make you cry. Shrek: No. Donkey: Oh, you leave em out in the sun, they get all brown, start sproutin' little white hairs. Shrek: NO. Layers. Onions have layers. Ogres have layers. Onions have layers. You get it? We both have layers. [sighs] Donkey: Oh, you both have layers. Oh. You know, not everybody like onions. (Ace Goodman) Shrek: Well, that's not very nice. [looks at Donkey] Shrek: It's just a donkey. (Ace Goodman) | |
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