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  • Uncle Ben: Peter, look. You're changing. I know. I went through exactly the same thing at your age.
    Peter Parker: No. Not exactly. (Ace Goodman)
  • [singing]
    Green Goblin: The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Down came the Goblin and took the spider out. (Ace Goodman)
  • Mary Jane: You know, you're taller than you look.
    Peter Parker: I hunch.
    Mary Jane: Don't. (Ace Goodman)
  • [trying to learn how to shoot a web]
    Spider-Man: Go web! Fly! Up, up, and away web! Shazaam! Go! Go! Go web go! Tally ho. (Ace Goodman)
  • Peter Parker: Some spiders change colors to blend into their environment. It's a defense mechanism.
    Harry Osborn: Peter, what makes you think I would want to know that?
    Peter Parker: Who wouldn't? (Ace Goodman)
  • Ring Announcer: What's your name kid?
    Peter Parker: The Human Spider.
    Ring Announcer: The Human Spider? That's it? That's the best you've got?
    Peter Parker: Yeah.
    Ring Announcer: Oh that sucks. (Ace Goodman)
  • Peter Parker: Spider-Man wasn't trying to attack the city, he was trying to save it. That's slander.
    J. Jonah Jameson: It is not. I resent that. Slander is spoken. In print, it's libel. (Ace Goodman)
  • Aunt May: You won't have a bite?
    Peter Parker: No thanks. Had a bite. (Ace Goodman)
  • Peter Parker: You know Harry... doesn't live on a little place I like to call Earth. (Ace Goodman)
  • [Peter is going to take a picture of Mary Jane]
    Mary Jane: Don't make me look ugly.
    Peter Parker: That's impossible. (Ace Goodman)
  • Norman Osborn: They're all beautiful, until they're snarling after your trust fund like a pack of ravening wolves. (Ace Goodman)
  • Harry Osborn: One day Spider-Man will pay. I swear on my father's grave Spider-Man will pay. (Ace Goodman)
  • [talking about Spider-Man]
    Punk Rock Girl: Guy with eight hands. Sounds hot. (Ace Goodman)
  • Mary Jane: What do you see coming for you?
    Peter Parker: I don't know. Whatever it is, it's something I never felt before.
    Mary Jane: And... what for me?
    Peter Parker: For you? You're gonna light up Broadway. (Ace Goodman)
  • Bonesaw McGraw: Hey freak show! You're going nowhere. I got you for three minutes. Three minutes of ME time! (Ace Goodman)
  • Uncle Ben: [changing a light bulb] And the Lord said, "Let there be light." And voil? There is light. Forty soft, glowing watts of it.
    Aunt May: Good boy. God will be thrilled, just don't fall on your ass. (Ace Goodman)
  • J. Jonah Jameson: He doesn't want to be famous? Then I'll make him infamous. (Ace Goodman)
  • Hoffman: We've got a page six problem.
    J. Jonah Jameson: We've got a page one problem, shut up. (Ace Goodman)
  • Aunt May: Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us...
    [the Green Goblin bursts through the window]
    Aunt May: [screams] DELIVER US!
    Green Goblin: [laughing maniacally] Finish it. FINISH IT.
    Aunt May: FROM EVIL! (Ace Goodman)
  • Peter Parker: No matter what I do, no matter how hard I try, the ones I love will always be the ones who pay. (Ace Goodman)
  • [to J. Jonah Jameson]
    Spider-Man: Hey, kiddo. Let Mom and Dad talk for a minute, will ya? (Ace Goodman)
  • Mary Jane: I better run, tiger. (Ace Goodman)
  • Bonesaw McGraw: What're ya doin' up there?
    Spider-Man: Staying away from you. That's a cute outfit. Did your husband give it to you? (Ace Goodman)
  • Flash Thompson: Think you're pretty funny, don't you, freak?
    Mary Jane: Flash, it was just an accident!
    Flash Thompson: My fist breaking your teeth, that's the accident.
    Mary Jane: C'mon, Flash, stop!
    Peter Parker: I don't want to fight you, Flash.
    Flash Thompson: I wouldn't want to fight me, neither. (Ace Goodman)
  • Green Goblin: Had you not been so selfish, your little girlfriend's death would have been quick and painless, but now that you've really pissed me off, I'm gonna finish her nice and slow. (Ace Goodman)
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  • If you enjoy the fragrance of a rose, you must accept the thorns which it bears. (Isaac Hayes)


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  • “I would like to think I would rise to the occasion, but it's just interesting to me how powerful human beings can be when pushed to their limit and I really wanted to find it realistically that she could fight back, that she could take the skills she had learned just from being a hotel manager and turn them around and actually escape the situation.” (Rachel McAdams) [think/human/find/fight]