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Scott Evil: What? Are you feeding him? Why don't you just kill him? Dr. Evil: I have an even better idea. I'm going to place him in an easily escapable situation involving an overly elaborate and exotic death. (Ace Goodman) [guard starts dipping mechanism] Dr. Evil: Close the tank! Scott Evil: Wait, aren't you even going to watch them? They could get away! Dr. Evil: No no no, I'm going to leave them alone and not actually witness them dying, I'm just gonna assume it all went to plan. What? Scott Evil: I have a gun, in my room, you give me five seconds, I'll get it, I'll come back down here, BOOM, I'll blow their brains out! Dr. Evil: Scott, you just don't get it, do ya? You don't. (Ace Goodman) Dr. Evil: An evil vet? Scott Evil: No! Maybe like work in a petting zoo. Dr. Evil: An evil petting zoo? Scott Evil: You always do that! (Ace Goodman) | |
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Therapist: He doesn't really want to kill you. Sometimes we just say that. Dr. Evil: No actually the boy is quite astute. I really am trying to kill him, but so far unsuccessfully. He's quite wily, like his old man. (Ace Goodman) [Dr. Evil and Frau Farbissina laugh] Paddy O'Brien: What? Why does everyone always laugh when I say that? They ARE after me lucky charms! (Ace Goodman) [c.f. Beyond the Valley of the Dolls (1970)] (Ace Goodman) Vanessa Kensington: No. Austin Powers: That's not the way to get ahead in life. Vanessa Kensington: No. Austin Powers: It's a shame he wasn't more headstrong. Vanessa Kensington: Hmm. Austin Powers: He'll never be the head of a major corporation. Vanessa Kensington: Okay, that'll do. Austin Powers: Okay. (Ace Goodman) Austin Powers: No, this is me in a nutshell: "Help! I'm in a nutshell! How did I get into this bloody great big nutshell? What kind of shell has a nut like this?" (Ace Goodman) Dr. Evil: It's Dr. Evil, I didn't spend six years in Evil Medical School to be called "mister," thank you very much. (Ace Goodman) Number Two: Sea Bass. Dr. Evil: [pause] Right. Number Two: They're mutated sea bass. Dr. Evil: Are they ill tempered? Number Two: Absolutely. Dr. Evil: Oh well, that's a start. (Ace Goodman) Dr. Evil: Scott, that hurts daddy when you say that. Honestly. (Ace Goodman) Austin Powers: Or sometimes not at all. (Ace Goodman) Austin Powers: Finally those capitalist pigs will pay for their crimes, eh? Eh comrades? Eh? Basil Exposition: Austin... we won. Austin Powers: Oh, smashing, groovy, yay capitalism! (Ace Goodman) [pause] Dr. Evil: By "caliber," of course, I refer to both the size of their gun barrels and the high quality of their characters... Two meanings... caliber... it's a homonym... Forget it. (Ace Goodman) | |
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