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  • Harry Burns: It is so nice when you can sit with someone and not have to talk. (Ace Goodman)
  • Sally Albright: I don't have to take this crap from you.
    Harry Burns: If you're so over Joe, why aren't you seeing anyone?
    Sally Albright: I see people.
    Harry Burns: See people? Have you slept with one person since you broke up with Joe?
    Sally Albright: What the hell does that have to do with anything? That will prove I'm over Joe? Because I fuck somebody? Harry, you're gonna have to move back to New Jersey because you've slept with everybody in New York and I don't see that turning Helen into a faint memory for you. Besides, I will make love to somebody when it is making love. Not the way you do it like you're out for revenge or something.
    Harry Burns: ...Are you finished now?
    Sally Albright: ...Yes.
    Harry Burns: Can I say something?
    Sally Albright: Yes.
    Harry Burns: ...I'm sorry. I'm sorry. (Ace Goodman)
  • Harry Burns: Why are you getting so upset? This is not about you. (Ace Goodman)
  • Harry Burns: You were going to be a gymnast.
    Sally Albright: A journalist.
    Harry Burns: Right, that's what I said. (Ace Goodman)
  • Harry Burns: I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night. And it's not because I'm lonely, and it's not because it's New Year's Eve. I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible. (Ace Goodman)
  • Harry Burns: I've been doing a lot of thinking, and the thing is, I love you.
    Sally Albright: What?
    Harry Burns: I love you.
    Sally Albright: How do you expect me to respond to this?
    Harry Burns: How about, you love me too.
    Sally Albright: How about, I'm leaving. (Ace Goodman)
  • Harry Burns: Repeat after me. Pepper.
    Sally Albright: Pepper.
    Harry Burns: Pepper.
    Sally Albright: Pepper.
    Harry Burns: Waiter, there is too much pepper on my paprikash.
    Sally Albright: Waiter, there is too much pepper on my paprikash.
    Harry Burns: But I would be proud to partake of your pecan pie. (Ace Goodman)
  • Mary Howard: What do you think I am?! He's a married man!
    Bridget Drake: Of course he is - the good ones always are. Someone has always beaten you to it. (Ace Goodman)
  • Stephen: Life's a stage.
    Katie: Life's a bitch.
    Stephen: Life's a bitch on the stage. (Ace Goodman)
  • Petra: Camille, I'd love to see you in the moonlight with your head thrown back and your body on fire. (Ace Goodman)
  • Reverend DeBoer: Yes, I think we have been guilty of homophobic cruelty, and, excluded people like you, in the past.
    Camille: People like me. (Ace Goodman)
  • Board President: So, we've covered abortion, church and state, predestination, drug abuse, prostitution -- ah, yes, homosexuality. How do you approach the homosexuality problem, Camille?
    Camille: Well, um, I'm not really sure I'd consider it a problem.
    Martin: I like what you said over at Tom's, Camille said that it's important to love the sinner but hate the sin, so that you're allowed to feel the desire but not act on that desire.
    Camille: Well, in hetero-- in retro-spect, sorry -- I've come to think that there's a lot of room for multiciplicity in God's creation.
    Reverend DeBoer: You are aware that that is contrary to doctrine in this matter.
    Camille: God... God cannot be so cruel as to decree that people like... like that can never, ever be contented. I mean, one's devotions are not entirely chosen. (Ace Goodman)
  • Martin: And these things pass.
    Camille: What things?
    Martin: These... passing things. (Ace Goodman)
  • Petra: Without music, life would be a mistake. (Ace Goodman)
  • Petra: So my name's Petra by the way.
    Camille: Oh yeah, I saw that on your card. And mine is Camille...
    Petra: Camille, that's nice, I like it, it's like "C'mere." It's nice. (Ace Goodman)
  • Petra: I love your sex. I love your wisdom and... the way you say "switcheroo." I love that sadness that you get in your eyes sometimes. And other stuff.
    Camille: But?
    Petra: But, we might be leaving tomorrow, and I can't stay and you can't leave. (Ace Goodman)
  • Petra: Fear is what you pay for adventure. (Ace Goodman)
  • Petra: Animals love you in a way people can't. It's so uncomplicated really, you know. Whether you're successful or not, or ugly, or... beautiful. They don't care. (Ace Goodman)
  • Tillie: Don't you love it the way dogs sometimes get this look like they got a hectic schedule to follow? Busy, busy, busy! (Ace Goodman)
  • Camille: Well, don't people like you just have friends, sometimes?
    Petra: Yes, 'people like me' do.
    Camille: And, why couldn't I be one?
    Petra: I'm attracted to you, Camille.
    Camille: It's ok, it's ok. We're not animals, we don't always have to act on our attractions.
    Petra: What would we do, as friends?
    Camille: Have fun.
    Petra: Fun -- sounds like a buddy movie.
    Camille: Yes, exactly. Like Thelma and Louise. But... without the guns.
    Petra: Oh, well, no guns, I don't know... (Ace Goodman)
  • [Timothy is trying to repair a fusebox after a blackout at the circus.]
    Timothy: Don't worry, honey, I'm getting it fixed.
    Tory: Don't worry, honey -- isn't that what you said just before the tent went up in flames?
    Timothy: One small fire and I'm responsible every time some little problem... Just keep your HAIR on your HEAD. (Ace Goodman)
  • Audrey Macleah: Well, it seems to me that you don't have a crime scene. And, you don't have any identifiable remains unless you make some assumptions. Now, in order to go forward and profile a suspect, you need a victimology. I mean, without that as a base you really don't have anything, do you? (Ace Goodman)
  • Audrey Macleah: Fuck you!
    Dr. Douglas Eben: That's not what I had in mind. (Ace Goodman)
  • "Killer" Tom Black Bull: Where's Meo?
    Red Dillon: Dead. Yep, he just come in here one night and said he was gonna die. The next morning he was dead. So I buried the old chili-eater out back there. (Ace Goodman)
  • Mary: Wouldn't you like to go outside, and commune with nature?
    "Killer" Tom Black Bull: You can commune by yourself. (Ace Goodman)
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  • Look, I wasn't saying the Beatles are better than God or Jesus. ( The Beatles)

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  • Music is a very personal and emotional form of communication. (Trevor Dunn)