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Freddy Krueger: Penny for your thoughts, chief? [Jason grabs him and pushes his throat to the machete] Freddy Krueger: Oh, scary. (Ace Goodman) Freddy Krueger: [disguised as Mark's brother] I need you to send a little message for me. That's all. Just a little message. Mark Davis: I'm not gonna do it. (screaming) I won't do it! [fully transformed back into himself] Freddy Krueger: NO? [slams the gloved hand on the wall next to Mark's ear] Mark Davis: I won't do it. [grabs Mark by his shirt sleeves and points a bladed finger at him] Freddy Krueger: I'll have to pass that message myself, won't I, hmm? (Ace Goodman) Mark: Do you want some free advice? Coffee. Make friends with it. (Ace Goodman) | |
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Male Counselor: [having sex with a female counselor] Can't you see that I'm busy here? Male Counselor: You mean you're not coming? Freddy Krueger: [the Counselor turns into Freddy Krueger and it is revealed that he is having sex with a dead girl's body] It's not my fault this bitch is dead on her feet. [he laughs, and waves the dead girl's hand at Lori] (Ace Goodman) Dr. Campbell: Look at you, you're exhausted. We need to get you to... [Dr. Campbell turns into Freddy Krueger] Freddy Krueger: Bed. (Ace Goodman) Heather: I should've been watching them, not drinking. not meeting a boy at the lake... [Heather morphs into a dead boy killed by Jason in the past] Dead boy on tree: I deserve to be punished... [Dead boy morphs into a dead girl with her throat slit, another past victim of Jason] Dead girl on tree: We all deserve to be punished... (Ace Goodman) Lori: And there were these little girls, and they were singing this song like... like... Mark: One, two, Freddy's coming for you. Do you know why they sing that? Because that's when he comes for you. (Ace Goodman) Will Rollins: Don't start with that dream demon shit again. OK? You know that's all just in your head. Mark Davis: Yeah, yeah, and who are you, the poster boy for sanity? (Ace Goodman) Freddy Krueger: Hey, asshole! Up here! [Jason looks up to see him and Freddy knocks down a stack of rebars which impale through Jason's body] (Ace Goodman) Imaginary William Shatner: Logic is the other guy's schtick, but yes. (Ace Goodman) Young Mark: Oh, Mom, how many times do I have to tell you? "Track" is what a train goes on, okay? "Trek" is what the Enterprise goes on, okay? Mark's Mom: Yeah, and they say the pain of childbirth ends with labor. (Ace Goodman) Imaginary William Shatner: I think I ought to tell you that that, uh, Aryan youth is gonna kick you into oblivion. Young Robert: But what about in "Arena" when Kirk fought the Gorn? That giant lizard monster was three times as big as him! Imaginary William Shatner: My boy, that was a TV show. I used a stunt double. I always use a stunt double. Except in love scenes. I insist on doing those myself. Young Robert: Well, what would you do to avoid a fight? Imaginary William Shatner: I wouldn't dress like a geek. Gold is not your color. Think earth tones. (Ace Goodman) Young Robert: Well... it was something he said. Imaginary William Shatner: What'd he say? Young Robert: You really don't want to know. Imaginary William Shatner: I really do want to know! Young Robert: He said that Han Solo was cooler than Captain Kirk. [pause] Imaginary William Shatner: Kick the little fucker's ass. (Ace Goodman) Robert: Looks like I'm going nowhere. Claire: Don't you fucking quote Star Wars at me! (Ace Goodman) | |
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