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Stokely: I just didn't want to never have done that. (Ace Goodman) Marybeth: Oh. Does it bother you, Zeke, my body? I'm gettin' kinda used to it myself. (Ace Goodman) Miss Burke: Eat me, you asshole! I'm the one with no tolerance, you pathetic little runt. Zeke: What are you going to do? Are you going to call my mother? Miss Burke: And how am I going to do that, little Zekey boy? Do you even know where she is? Europe, Sri Lanka, Japan? I wonder what remote location she went to this week... to hide from her great, big bastard mistake. I've taken your shit for TOO FUCKING LONG! You dickless, drug-induced excuse for a human being. Zeke: Whoa, woman. What are you on? Miss Burke: Woman"? Did you just say "woman"? I'm sick of you, little boy. And if I have to see you peddling your little "Wonder Dust" again, I'm gonna shove my foot so far up your ass, you'll be sucking my toes 'till graduation. [exits] Zeke: She got some bad shit! (Ace Goodman) Miss Burke: Eat me, you asshole! I'm the one with no tolerance, you pathetic little runt! Zeke: [sarcastic] What are you going to do? Are you going to call my mother? Miss Burke: And how am I going to do that, little Zekey boy? Do you even know where she is? Europe? Sri Lanka? Japan? I wonder what remote location she went to this week... to hide from her great, big bastard mistake. I've taken your shit for TOO FUCKING LONG you dickless, drug-induced excuse for a human being! Zeke: Whoa... woman. What are you on? Miss Burke: Woman? Did you just say "woman"? I'm sick of you, little boy! And if I have to see you peddling your little "Wonder Dust" again, I'm gonna shove my foot so far up your ass, you'll be sucking my toes 'till graduation! [exits] Zeke: [to himself] Whoa! That lady took some bad shit! (Ace Goodman) | |
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Zeke: Is she always this much fun? Stan: Sometimes she can be a real bitch. (Ace Goodman) Casey: Fuck you, Zeke. (Ace Goodman) Stokely: No shit. (Ace Goodman) Casey: I'd rather be afraid! Marybeth: Fine. Have it your way! 'Cause this is where your land of fiction is always right: we win. End of story! (Ace Goodman) Stan: No way, you're takin' it! Casey: [Laughing and obviously high] You're takin' it! [Stan picks up gun and points it at Casey] Stan: What the hell is wrong with him? Zeke: He's tweaking you asshole! Let him fucking tweak! Casey: Tweak! Tweak! (Ace Goodman) [Zeke sits down on his car] Zeke: Well, Miss Burke, we have a problem because I'm sitting on my car and that's my property. Miss Burke: Well I've been getting complaints from several students that you've sold them mind-altering substances. Now do you wanna talk to me about it, or take it up with Principal Drake? Zeke: You're too tense, Miss Burke. But I've got just the thing for ya. Miss Burke: You know, Zeke, I am the authority figure here, it's time you realized that. Zeke: Helps relief from blockage caused by dietary stress: Chocolate flavored laxatives. Miss Burke: You know Zeke, if you applied just 5 percent of that intellect to your studies you could've made up your finals last summer and you wouldn't have had to repeat your senior year. Zeke: Not a chocolate lover, huh? How about this: Condoms. Magnum Sized. And they're cherry flavored. C'mon... they're on me. Miss Burke: That's so rude. (Ace Goodman) F'%# Up #1: Dude, that's not me. Doesn't even look like me F'%# Up #2: It's 50 bucks right? F'%# Up #1: Does that look like me? F'%# Up#2: Uh, its the new you. F'%# Up #1: I don't know man. How do we even know these things are gonna work? Zeke: Trust me man, I'm brilliant. F'%# Up #1: Then why are you repeating your senior year? (Ace Goodman) Marybeth: Really? Zeke: Well, they are still *breathing*, but for all intents and purposes they might as well be dead. (Ace Goodman) Zeke: Aliens are taking over the earth. Weigh it! (Ace Goodman) Coach Willis: I always wanted to do that. (Ace Goodman) Delilah: You're not good at studying Stan, you're good at football. You should stick with what you're good at. Stan: Yeah, I've always been good at football, and basketball, and every other sport I've tried. Maybe I should try something I'm not so good at, something different. Delilah: And what am I supposed to do while you're on a yellow book quest for a brain? Stan: What? Delilah: The accepted social order is that head cheerleaders date star quarterbacks, not academic wannabees. Stan: Don't be so superficial... Delilah: Superficial... four syllables, that's really good Stan, you're on your way. Let me know how the cure for cancer goes. Stan: I was hoping you'd be with me on this... (Ace Goodman) Stokely: Get a fucking eye dog! Stan: Well maybe if you didn't paint your fucking eyes shut! (Ace Goodman) | |
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