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Earl McManus: Oh God, that's not a bracelet son, that there is a device that your Daddy has to put on his hee... his... hee... happy birthday son, you got a bracelet! Norms Son: Cool. (Ace Goodman) Deuce Bigalow: Wait, you don't have to do this Gaspar, because you CAN please a Woman, these Gigalos... don't know what they're talking about. Chadsworth Buckingham, III: Is he talking about us? Deuce Bigalow: ...and besides, do you think all a Woman really wants is for some man to give her a Mud-Pretzel, Turkish Snow Cone, or an Irish... Facial? Chadsworth Buckingham, III: YES they DO! (Ace Goodman) Deuce Bigalow: Please, you don't have to do this. Gaspar Voorsboch: Those Manwhores ruined my life! Deuce Bigalow: Just give me the detonater. Gaspar Voorsboch: No, my Penis exploded! Deuce Bigalow: O.k., that's a tough one, I'll give you that, but... having a Penis, is way over rated, trust me. (Ace Goodman) | |
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[the Prisoners all stand, and glare at him] (Ace Goodman) Gaspar Voorsboch: Oh. [Starts speeding up] Deuce Bigalow: Hey what are you doing, she's right behind us. Eva: Deuce, he's the killer! Deuce Bigalow: Huh, what? Eva: You're with the killer! Deuce Bigalow: I'm with the dealer? Eva: He's the Man-Whore killer! Deuce Bigalow: Huh, eighteen wheeler? Eva: [Comes up closer to Deuce] My Uncle is the killer! Deuce Bigalow: Oh, I'm with the... [Gaspar points a gun towards him] Deuce Bigalow: ... killer? Gaspar Voorsboch: She said: you're with the killer you idiot. Deuce Bigalow: [Relieved] Ohhhhh. [Notices a hand bag with the Leopard-coat, and a wig barely showing out] Deuce Bigalow: ... but... why, what did Man-Whores ever do to YOU? Gaspar Voorsboch: What did they do to me? All my life, I wanted to be one thing, a Gigalo, yes, me, Gaspar Voorboch! I'll never forget that day, it was my first Semester at Man-Whore University. (Ace Goodman) John Milton: Why not? I'm here on the ground with my nose in it since the whole thing began. I've nurtured every sensation man's been inspired to have. I cared about what he wanted and I never judged him. Why? Because I never rejected him. In spite of all his imperfections, I'm a fan of man! I'm a humanist. Maybe the last humanist. (Ace Goodman) [stops and pauses] John Milton: Underestimated from day one. You'd never think I was a master of the universe, now would ya? (Ace Goodman) Kevin Lomax: [quietly] Is there more to it? Eddie Barzoon: Just this room. Kevin Lomax: And a bedroom? Eddie Barzoon: No bedroom. Kevin Lomax: Where does he sleep? Eddie Barzoon: Who said he sleeps? Kevin Lomax: Where does he fuck? John Milton: [coming up to them] Everywhere. (Ace Goodman) Pam: Isn't everything? (Ace Goodman) Kevin Lomax: Always. (Ace Goodman) John Milton: Overrated. Biochemically no different than eating large quantities of chocolate. (Ace Goodman) John Milton: Vanity, definitely my favorite sin. (Ace Goodman) Florida Prosecutor: Go on, Barbara. Barbara: We go back to our homeroom for dismissal. Unless you have a pass for sports or something. Florida Prosecutor: Is that what you did on the day in question? Barbara: No. Mr. Gettys asked me to stay after class. (Ace Goodman) Kevin Lomax: Let me guess. Alice Lomax: Fallen, fallen, is Babylon the great. It has become a dwelling place of demons." Revelation 18. Wouldn't hurt you to look it over. Kevin Lomax: Couldn't forget it if I tried. Alice Lomax: Oh, really? And what *happened* to Babylon? (Ace Goodman) | |
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