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Quotes of Movie: A Fish Called Wanda [1988]
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Otto: Don't call me stupid.
Wendy: Why on earth not? (unknown)
[repeated line]
Otto: Don't call me stupid! (unknown)
Otto: [puts a bag over Archie's head] Hello, Mr. Burglar! Going somewhere? Thought you could rob Mr. Leach, eh? Well, I'm going to teach you a lesson!
[kicks him in the stomach]
Otto: He just happens to be a very good friend of mine!
Archie: Otto! Otto! Otto!
Otto: [comes back with a long-handled pan] And he's going to be very pleased with me to find you here, all tied up and ready for the police!
[knocks Archie out with a pan]
Otto: And don't call me "Otto." To you, I am "Mr...”
[stops, lifts bag, sees it's Archie, screams]
Otto: Oh, my God... Oh... Oh my God. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
[pats Archie's face]
Otto: Please, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I didn't know it was you. How could I know it was you? I mean, how could you expect me to guess? Stupid jerk! I mean, what the fuck were you doing *robbing* your *own house?*
[kicks Archie in the stomach]
Otto: You asshole! You stupid, stiff, pompous, English...!
[screams and recoils]
Otto: I'm sorry! I'm sorry. Uh... uh... yeah.
[runs] (unknown)
Otto: We didn't lose Vietnam. It was a tie! (unknown)
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Wanda: Let's make love.
Archie: Well, if you absolutely insist... (unknown)
[Archie has put his gun down to fist fight with Otto]
Archie: I used to box for Oxford.
Otto: Oh, yeah?
[Otto quickly picks up Archie's gun, and points it at him]
Otto: I used to kill for the CIA. (unknown)
Wanda: I want you to know something Otto.
Otto: What?
Wanda: Even if you were my brother I'd still want to fuck you. (unknown)
Airline Employee: Aisle or window, smoking or non?
Otto: What was the part in the middle? (unknown)
Wanda: The central message of Buddhism is not "every man for himself". (unknown)
Otto: I love watching your ass when you walk. Is that beautiful or what? Don't go near him, he's mine. (unknown)
Otto: You know your problem? You don't like winners.
Archie: Winners?
Otto: Yeah. Winners.
Archie: Winners, like North Vietnam?
Otto: Shut up. We didn't lose Vietnam. It was a tie.
Archie: [going into a cowboy-like drawl] I'm tellin' ya baby, they kicked your little ass there. Boy, they whooped yer hide REAL GOOD. (unknown)
Wanda: I'll be right back, take your clothes off. (unknown)
Otto: You pompous, stuck-up, snot-nosed, English, giant, twerp, scumbag, fuck-face, dickhead, asshole.
Archie: How very interesting. You're a true vulgarian, aren't you?
Otto: You are the vulgarian, you fuck. (unknown)
[repeated line]
Otto: Asshole! (unknown)
Wanda: What have you found out?
Otto: Not a lot.
Wanda: You realise he's in court tomorrow?
Otto: I know. I know that!
Wanda: So nothing, huh?
Otto: Nix! Zip! Diddly! Bupkis!
[seductively]
Otto: Niente! (unknown)
[Archie visits George, who is guarded by two policemen]
Archie: We need to talk.
George: You tell those pigs to fuck off.
Archie: Fuck off, pigs.
[the two policemen don't move]
Archie: Did you hear what I said? Fuck off! (unknown)
[Otto dangles Archie out a window]
Archie: All right, all right, I apologize.
Otto: You're really sorry.
Archie: I'm really really sorry, I apologize unreservedly.
Otto: You take it back.
Archie: I do, I offer a complete and utter retraction. The imputation was totally without basis in fact, and was in no way fair comment, and was motivated purely by malice, and I deeply regret any distress that my comments may have caused you, or your family, and I hereby undertake not to repeat any such slander at any time in the future.
Otto: OK. (unknown)
Wanda: You just wanted to get me into bed.
Archie: I fell in love with you.
Wanda: How come you dumped me then.
Archie: I wasn't rich enough, remember.
Wanda: Say something in Russian.
Archie: No. (unknown)
Otto: It's K-K-K-Ken c-c-c-coming to k-k-k-kill me. (unknown)
Otto West: Look, you obviously don't know anything about intelligence work, lady. It's an X-K-Red-27 technique.
Wendy: My father was in the Secret Service, Mr. Manfredjinsinjin, and I know perfectly well that you don't keep the general public informed when you are "debriefing KGB defectors in a safe house." (unknown)
Otto: Well, would you like to know what you'd be without us, the good ol' U.S. of A. to protect you? I'll tell you. The smallest fucking province in the Russian Empire, that's what. So don't call me stupid, lady. Just thank me. (unknown)
Wanda: To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people. I've known sheep who could outwit you. I've worn dresses with higher IQs, but you think you're an intellectual, don't you, ape?
Otto: Apes don't read philosophy.
Wanda: Yes they do, Otto, they just don't understand it. (unknown)
Archie: You make me feel free.
Wanda: Free?
Archie: Wanda, do you have any idea what it's like being English? Being so correct all the time, being so stifled by this dread of, of doing the wrong thing, of saying to someone "Are you married?" and hearing "My wife left me this morning," or saying, uh, "Do you have children?" and being told they all burned to death on Wednesday. You see, Wanda, we'll all terrified of embarrassment. That's why we're so... dead. Most of my friends are dead, you know, we have these piles of corpses to dinner. But you're alive, God bless you, and I want to be, I'm so fed up with all this. I want to make love with you, Wanda. I'm a good lover - at least, used to be, back in the early 14th century. Can we go to bed?
Wanda: Yeah. (unknown)
Archie: Your brother didn't bring you here this time, did he?
Wanda: No.
Archie: He's no idea?
Wanda: He doesn't have a clue.
Archie: What?
Wanda: He's so dumb...
Archie: Really?
Wanda: ...he thought that the Gettysburg Address was where Lincoln lived. (unknown)
Otto: Pork away pal. Fuck her blue. (unknown)
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Movie: A Fish Called Wanda [1988] | [2]
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