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Quotes of Movie: Bad Eggs [2003]

  • Ted Pratt:
    Yep... I smell fuckwits.

  • Mike Paddock:
    You saved our arses back there Northey. Where'd you get the shooter?



    Northey:
    Oh, it's my father's.



    Mike Paddock:
    Aren't they illegal now?



    Northey:
    It's for sporting purposes.



    Mike Paddock:
    Right. And tell me again, which sport is it that uses a semi-automatic weapon?



    Northey:
    Golf. He's a very aggressive golfer.

  • Ben Kinnear:
    Fuck me rigid... he's fair up the clack!

  • Julie Bale:
    You here on your own?



    Ben Kinnear:
    Yeah, my girlfriend's...



    Julie Bale:
    Imaginary?

  • Ben Kinnear:
    Photocopier's busted.



    Julie Bale:
    Still?



    Ben Kinnear:
    Yeah. I have to walk round the office describing my arse to everybody.

  • Gavin Clack:
    Welcome back to The Million Dollar Question, the show where ordinary Australians can win up to twenty thousand dollars.

  • Ben Kinnear:
    [after kneeing Wicks in the testicles] Anyone for Plum Jam?

  • Pendlebury:
    You guys have made a fair bit of progress. I'll be quite happy to put this one to bed.



    Ben Kinnear:
    I'll bet you fuckin' will.



    Doug Gillespie:
    That's enough! He didn't burn down an entire house full of evidence.



    Ben Kinnear:
    He wouldn't know where to start.

  • Ted Pratt:
    In hospital you get to catch up on your reading.


    [holds up newspapers]



    Mike Paddock:
    Those three disasters have been taken completely out of context!

  • Mike Paddock:
    So why'd this bloke top himself?



    Ben Kinnear:
    They found some photos in the car. Let's just say the "respected magistrate" liked to... uh...



    Mike Paddock:
    What?



    Ben Kinnear:
    I'm trying to think of a legal term that has... you know, a sexual double-meaning?



    Mike Paddock:
    'Perform acts with underage prostitutes'?



    Ben Kinnear:
    Is that a legal term?



    Mike Paddock:
    Dunno, but it's the exact phrase I put on my Psychological Test under 'ambitions'.


    [pause]



    Mike Paddock:
    There's someone behind me, isn't there? And it's the worst possible person it could be, isn't it?

  • Wicks:
    Any last words?



    Julie Bale:
    Plum jam.

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