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Quotes of Movie: Alice's Restaurant [1969]

  • Arlo Guthrie:
    Group W is where they putcha if you may not be moral enough to join the army after committin' your special crime. There was all kinds of mean, nasty ugly-lookin' people on the bench there. There was mother rapers... father stabbers... father rapers... Father rapers! Sittin' right there on the bench next to me!

  • Officer Obie:
    Kid, I'm going to put you in the cell, I want your wallet and your belt.



    Arlo Guthrie:
    Obie, I can understand you wanting my wallet so I don't have any money to spend in the cell, but what do you want my belt for?



    Officer Obie:
    Kid, we don't want any hangings.



    Arlo Guthrie:
    Obie, did you think I was going to hang myself for littering?

  • Officer Obie:
    Want your wallets and your belts. Put everything on the desk.



    Arlo Guthrie:
    I can understand you wanting our wallets, so we don't have any money to spend in the cell, but what do you want our belts for?



    Officer Obie:
    Kid, we don't want any hanging.



    Arlo Guthrie:
    [pause] Obie, do you think we're gonna hang ourselves for littering?

  • Arlo Guthrie:
    Just what I've always wanted.



    Alice Brock:
    A restaurant?



    Arlo Guthrie:
    No, a friend with a restaurant.

  • Alice Brock:
    Take off those handcuffs!



    Officer Obie:
    You're interfering in the performance of my duties.



    Alice Brock:
    You're a meathead - haven't you play-acted cop enough for one day?



    Officer Obie:
    This side is reserved for officers of the law and criminals.



    Alice Brock:
    Pig-eyed idiot!



    Officer Obie:
    Alice, I've had enough garbage for one day, yours and theirs.



    Alice Brock:
    Stupid bastard!



    Officer Obie:
    Alice...



    Alice Brock:
    Cradle hopper!



    Officer Obie:
    Alice!



    Alice Brock:
    Turkey raper!

  • Arlo Guthrie:
    Obie, when do we get our bread and water?



    Officer Obie:
    Shut up, kid.

  • Arlo Guthrie:
    Girdles feel funny.

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