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Quotes of Movie: "This Hour Has 22 Minutes" [1992]
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Announcer: This Hour Has 22 Minutes is a satirical examination of daily events. Some viewers may not share this sense of humour. The US is our neighbour, our ally, our trading partner, and our friend, and sometimes we'd like to give them *such* a smack. [on Canada and the US] We're bigger, and we're on top. If this was prison, they would be our bitch. Molly Maguire: This news has sent shockwaves through the gay community of the Northwest Territories. We go to him now. | |
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Jackie Biskupski is running for a seat in the Utah Legislature, and she's attracting a lot of attention because she's a lesbian. Her Republican opponent, Dan Alderson, is a staunch Mormon, and is running a negative ad campaign calling her lifestyle abnormal and deviant. His six wives agree. Here's to democracy. May we get the government we deserve. [at end of show] Well, that's the way we saw the world this week. At this time, we need to look to Canada's poets for inspiration. And when we think Canada, when we think poets, we all think... Trooper! [followed by footage of Canadian politicians singing along to "Raise A Little Hell"] [after opening] Warning! To France! If you don't go to war now, you won't be able to surrender later What kind of show is this anyway ? Bas MacLaren: We're 22 minutes. We're like the news, but drunk. [after the premiere of the Spice Girls movie] [singing] Frank McMillan: "You know what I want, what I really really want" Frank McMillan: [yelling] My eight bucks back! Richard, this is just the kind of pretentious bullshit that Americans always say to French girls so they can sleep with them. No offence an' all, but, you're fucked in the head, right? Richard: My name is Richard. So what else do you need to know? Stuff about my family, or where I'm from? None of that matters. Not once you cross the ocean and cut yourself loose, looking for something more beautiful, something more exciting and yes, I admit, something more dangerous. So after eighteen hours in the back of an airplane, three dumb movies, two plastic meals, six beers and absolutely no sleep, I finally touch down; in Bangkok. Hey! Do you need somewhere to stay? Richard: Well, I'll be fine. I'll find my own place thanks! Hustler: Good time boy! Girl! Fucking! No problem. Hustler: You wanna drink snake blood? Richard: Wait a minute, did you say snake blood? Hustler: Oh yeah! Richard: No thanks. Hustler: What is wrong with snake blood? Richard: I just don't like the idea. Hustler: Or maybe you're scared, afraid of something new! Richard: No, I just don't like the idea, that's all. Hustler: Ah-ha! Just like every tourist, you are all the same, just like America! Richard: And me, I still believe in paradise. But now at least I know it's not some place you can look for, 'cause it's not where you go. It's how you feel for a moment in your life when you're a part of something, and if you find that moment... it lasts forever... Trust me, it's paradise. This is where the hungry come to feed. For mine is a generation that circles the globe and searches for something we haven't tried before. So never refuse an invitation, never resist the unfamiliar, never fail to be polite and never outstay the welcome. Just keep your mind open and suck in the experience. And if it hurts, you know what? It's probably worth it. One kilometer. Françoise: Two. Etienne: Richard? Richard: I dunno; I'm American. Etienne: So? Richard: I think in miles, not kilometers. Etienne: Okay, so how many miles do you think it is? Richard: I dunno, but it looks like a long way away. I had nothing left to offer but pure reflex. Pure reflex and mankind's basic drive for survival, that somehow shouts, "NO - I WILL NOT DIE TODAY!" The only downer is, everyone's got the same idea. We all travel thousands of miles just to watch TV and check in to somewhere with all the comforts of home, and you gotta ask yourself, what is the point of that? I just feel like everyone tries to do something different, but you always wind up doing the same damn thing. I told myself spreading news was part of a traveller's nature, but if I was being completely honest, I was just like everybody else: shit-scared of the great unknown. Desperate to take a little piece of home with me. When you develop an infatuation for someone you always find a reason to believe that this is exactly the person for you. It doesn't need to be a good reason. Taking photographs of the night sky, for example. Now, in the long run, that's just the kind of dumb, irritating habit that would cause you to split up. But in the haze of infatuation, it's just what you've been searching for all these years. Now get some sleep, I may wish to have sex again before we eat breakfast. Okay, it's like this. Bugs is my boyfriend, my partner. Okay? And you are someone I just had sex with. All right? Richard: Oh, tha - that's fine. That's absolutely fine. Sal: Good. Now get some sleep. I may wish to have sex again before we eat breakfast. | |
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