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Quotes of Movie: "The Odd Couple" [1970]
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Narrator: On November 13, Felix Unger was asked to remove himself from his place of residence; that request came from his wife. Deep down, he knew she was right, but he also knew that some day he would return to her. With nowhere else to go, he appeared at the home of his friend, Oscar Madison. Several years earlier, Madison's wife had thrown HIM out, requesting that HE never return. Can two divorced men share an apartment without driving each other crazy? The man puts his ketchup on his salad. Oscar Madison: So? I like ketchup. It's like tomato wine. What are you doing? Oscar Madison: Sterilizing the wound. Felix Unger: With beer? Oscar Madison: It's got alcohol in it. Everyone thinks I'm a hypochondriac. It makes me sick. | |
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I'm going to the studio to pick up the gauntlet he threw down. Murray Greshler: You're so tidy. You want brown juice or green juice? Felix Unger: What's the difference? Oscar Madison: Three weeks. You ruined my wine. Felix Unger: Here's a dollar. Buy another three bottles. Everything you've ever owned is on that bed. What do you dream about? Oscar Madison: Living alone. Don't talk to me about Christmas, will ya? All that sticky, phony goodwill. I'd like to get a giant candy cane and beat the wings off a sugar plum fairy. Felix Unger: What's that? Oscar Madison: Guess I forgot to unpack from the last trip. Felix Unger: There are things growing under there! Oscar Madison: Honey, that's fun fat. Everybody has that. Felix Unger: I don't. Oscar Madison: You don't have any fun either. [pointing to Oscar] Either he leaves or I leave. Felix Unger: [turning to Oscar] Leave! Princess: My country is so small we only sent one athlete to the Olympics. Oscar Madison: Oh? What event did he compete in? Princess: All of them! Oscar Madison: How did he do? Princess: He died in the relays. [while doing a commercial] I am a dramatization of a doctor. [to woman on witness stand] Ah... you *assumed*. My dear, you should never *assume*. You see, when you *assume* [writes the word "assume" on a blackboard] Felix Unger: , you make an *ass*... out of *you*... and *me*. Felix Unger: Oh, Oscar, Oscar, Oscar! Howard Cosell: Don't call me Howie! She likes... David Cassidy better than me! [Despondent that his daughter, Edna, isn't speaking to him] Oscar Madison: So do I! | |
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