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Quotes of Movie: "The Jack Dee Show" [1992]

  • Jack Dee:
    I love to be in Britain, when it's hot weather. I love it when you get four or five days of hot weather, because then people in Kent run out of water, don't they? Know what I like to do? I like to ring them up, and play the sound of running water down the phone.


    [Pretending to be on the telephone]



    Jack Dee:
    Hello, I just washed my car. Probably water the lawn in a minute. Might have a bath, might not, see how I feel. I'll probably fill the bath, not even use it.

  • Jack Dee:
    I am trying out some stuff tonight, not sure how it's going to go. You know what it's like when you're on drugs for the first time. I actually... I hate people who think it's cleaver to take drugs, like customs officers. Aren't they a bunch of b*****ds, all that finger up the a***hole, all day long. They put a uniform on, for a job like that, can you imagine doing that? 'Just off to work now dear'. 'Have a nice day day at the orafice'.

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  • Dance is certainly a sport, and they are phenomenal athletes, and they're also artists. (Neve Campbell)