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Quotes of Movie: "The Good Life" [1975]

  • Margo:
    Did I hear a dinner gong?



    Tom:
    Not unless the chicken jumped out of the oven and banged one.

  • [Margo and Jerry walk in on Tom chasing after Barbara with the scissors]



    Jerry:
    I see the asylum haven't sent the van yet!

  • Jerry:
    Brick by brick, she's building a madhouse!

  • Barbara:
    I suppose we must be rather a blot on the avenue's escutcheon.



    Margo:
    Yes, you are.



    Barbara:
    Oh.



    Margo:
    But you are very dear friends. And by now I have risen like a phoenix from the fires of your eccentricities.



    Tom:
    Ah, don't she talk lovely!



    Barbara:
    Yeah, very nice.



    Margo:
    You know what I mean. Nothing you can do now will shock me. It's quite simple.



    Tom:
    Yes. I see that. When's the boar-walker coming, Barbara?



    Barbara:
    Tomorrow.



    Margo:
    Boar-walker? What's a boar-walker?



    Tom:
    This chap we know is bringing his boar to serve Pinky.



    Margo:
    With what?


    [Tom smiles]



    Margo:
    Oh, my God!



    Barbara:
    Margo, you're shocked!



    Margo:
    Where?



    Tom:
    Not in here, in the garden.



    Margo:
    But I shall be able to see it over the fence.



    Barbara:
    Only if you're looking.

  • [Tom and Jerry have been playing golf with Sir]



    Tom:
    Hello, girls. Had a good gossip?



    Barbara:
    No, we've been playing strip poker with the postman.

  • Jerry:
    I was just telephoning to find out if I can have my car today. Oh, Tuesday.


    [Margo grabs the phone from Jerry]



    Margo:
    What do you mean Tuesday?


    [to Jerry]



    Margo:
    Be quiet!


    [on telephone]



    Margo:
    I don't care if the spare parts come from Mars. Go and collect them. "A bottle-neck in the lube bay." What does that mean in English? Well, say lubrication, then.



    Jerry:
    Margo!



    Margo:
    [to Jerry] Be quiet, Jerry.


    [on telephone]



    Margo:
    All right. Go and look at your wretched worksheet. No, you may not tinkle me back. I'll hold on.

  • Tom:
    [tiredly] Barbara, I can't get my wellies off.

  • Margo:
    [reading from a card] "The Ooh-Aah bird is so-called because it lays square eggs." I don't understand that.

  • Tom:
    Come on, Margo. Get your hat on.



    Margo:
    This is the "Daily Mirror".



    Jerry:
    Please, have the "Telegraph".



    Margo:
    Thank you.

  • Margo:
    Why don't you just throw a bucket of mud on the floor?



    Jerry:
    Look, I've just cut my finger clipping your blasted hedge.



    Margo:
    Don't swear, Jerry. And don't bleed in the sink, I've just cleaned it.

  • Margo:
    Road cleaning, I shall pay. Street lighting, I shall pay. Ground rent, I shall pay. But when it comes to the drain in front of my house, I shall not. Because it is blocked up and overflowing.



    Mr. Squires - Clerk:
    I shall make a note of that.



    Margo:
    You will do more than that, Mr. Squires. You will have a plumber on my door step at nine o'clock tomorrow morning with a plunger in his band, or you will not get a penny.



    Mr. Squires - Clerk:
    Just who do think you are, Mrs. Ledbetter?



    Margo:
    I am the silent majority.

  • Tom:
    [calls through the letterbox] Bring out your dead! Bring out your dead!



    Margo:
    Tom!


    [pauses]



    Margo:
    *What* is that?



    Tom:
    It's two dustbins on a trolley.



    Margo:
    I can see it's two dustbins on a trolley and when I asked you the question it was a rhetorical one which does not need a direct answer as you knew very well in the first place.



    Tom:
    Oh. You make me hold my breath when you do those long sentences, Margo.



    Margo:
    What *is* it?



    Tom:
    It's two rhetorical dustbins on a rhetorical trolley.



    Margo:
    Then will you kindly remove them from my crazy paving before someone sees us.



    Tom:
    They'd have less chance of seeing us if we hide behind the dustbins.

  • Tom:
    I'm stronger that you are and I can pin you to the bed any time I feel like it.



    Barbara:
    Rubbish.

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