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Quotes of Movie: "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air" [1990
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Will: I'd like to Aunt Viv, really. But it's hard to get my groove on with an old woman. [Vivian glares] Will: Oh, you don't know "kid talk". You know, "bad" is good, "stupid" is wonderful, and "old" is uh... beautiful. You *so* old Aunt Viv. You're the *oldest* woman I've even seen. I've always wondered... since coffee is made from beans, does that make it a vegetable? For a long time it gave me nightmares, witnessing an injustice like that... It's a constant reminder of just how unfair this world can be... I can still hear them taunting him...”Silly rabbit, Trix are for kids!"... I mean, WHY COULDN'T THEY JUST GIVE HIM SOME CEREAL? Will: [singing] I'm stuck in a basement, sittin' on a tricycle, girl gettin' on my nerves; Goin' outta my mind, I thought she was fine, don't know if her body is hers. | |
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Vivian, you are so naive. You would believe Will if he told you that he were some big rap star, whose album just went platinum. Making a baby truly is a blessed event. Will: Don't you mean "Having a baby"? Jazz: Trust me on this. Now what do we do when we get caught? Geoffrey: Laugh. I'm gonna pop that little zit when I get home. Penn State would've been my first choice if my applications to Princeton, Yale, and Talledega Tech had fallen through. Dr. Hoover: You must have been an athlete in your thinner days. [Phillip and Dr. Hoover are in a fight] Dr. Hoover, the school where you got your degree, did you find it on the back of a matchbook? Dr. Hoover: Penn State, my brother. Phillip Banks: Really? Good school. I was thinking of going there if my scholarship to Princeton, Yale, Warton, and Talladega Tech had fallen through! Dr. Hoover: Impressive, you must of been quite an athlete in your thinner days. Phillip Banks: Hey, hey, lets stick to the topic okay? Dr. Hoover: Fine. Speaking as a doctor, I think your daughter should be heavily sedated and immediately institutionalized. Phillip Banks: Well speaking as a lawyer, I can only say that your daughter fits the criminal profile to a T, right down to the sloping forehead, and the wide jaws suitable for grains and small rodents! Dr. Hoover: I think you have her confused with your moma! Will: [Phillip punches Dr. Hoover and knocks him down] ThatÂ’s it Uncle Phil, your grounded! [to Dr. Hoover] Will: You know, I'd be happy to perscribe something for that. [Phillip and Dr. Hoover are in a fight] Dr. Hoover, the school where you got your degree, did you find it on the back of a matchbook? Dr. Hoover: Penn State, my brother. Phillip Banks: Really? Good school. I was thinking of going there if my scholarship to Princeton, Yale, Warton, and Taladega Tech had fallen through! Dr. Hoover: Impressive, you must of been quite an athlete in your thinner days. Phillip Banks: Hey, hey, lets stick to the topic okay? Dr. Hoover: Fine. Speaking as a doctor, I think your daughter should be heavly sudaited and immediatley institusionalized. Phillip Banks: Well speaking as a lawyer, I can only say that your daughter fits the criminal profile to a T, right down to the sloping forehead, and the wide jaws suitable for brains and small rodents! Dr. Hoover: I think you have her confused with your moma! Will: [Phillip punches Dr. Hoover and knocks him down] Thats it Uncle Phil, your grounded! [to Dr. Hoover] Will: You know, I'd be happy to perscribe something for that. [Jameson is superstisious and thinks Will is a good luck charm. His horoscope says to stay away from leos] My lucky numbers have always been 3 and 7. Will, when is your birthday? Will: July 3rd. Jameson: What year? Will: 1973. Jameson: So you were born on 7-3-73? My lucky numbers! Phillip Banks: Jameson, its just a coincidence. Jameson: Coincidence? I don't think so. Carlton: I was born August 4th, 1974. Jameson: [Jumps back] A leo? Between you and the humpty dance, I'll have to get a metal plate on my butt. Carlton, I misjudged you. You're a lot cooler than I thought. Hey, you wanna go to the club with us tonight? Carlton: I don't have a date. Will: Carlton, never bring a sandwich to a buffet. I need more ice. Carlton: You need more ice, *what*? Janet: I need more ice in my warm soda. Carlton: [corrects Janet] You need more ice, *please*. Janet: What did you say to me? Waitress: He said, you need more ice, *please*. Well, someone has her rude hat on tonight. I'm starvin'. When do we eat here? Phillip Banks: *We* eat here later, *you* eat here never. Jazz: [looking Phillip up and down] Looks like *you* eat here *often*. [singing while playing harmonica] My butler is black/My butler is blue/His honey has green/Comin' out her wazoo. I smell cheap cologne and fried chicken. Jazz: I resent that. Yeah, my first time was with a girl from the projects. Best 50 bucks I ever spent... Carlton, I think you've been deprived of oxygen at birth. Am I alone in this, or did y'all know he was white? I mean - tall. You're the man, Will. You're the man. I'm just the man behind the man. Will: Uh, what're you doin' back there? [to Phillip] Hey, hey, hey man. Man, have I told you how thin you're lookin' lately? [explaining a shrunken shirt] The directions on the shirt said "Hand Wash". So that's exactly what I did. Before I put the clothes in the washer, I washed my hands. | |
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