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Quotes of Movie: "Teachers" [2001]

  • Kurt McKenna:
    [Brian and Kurt attempt to dissuade Simon from going travelling in South America:] Brian, word association: Paris?



    Brian Steadman:
    Croissants.



    Kurt McKenna:
    Spain?



    Brian Steadman:
    Bulls.



    Kurt McKenna:
    South America?



    Brian Steadman:
    Hostage situation.

  • Kurt McKenna:
    Simon, will you please tell Brian that I don't need a lift?



    Simon Casey:
    [noticing smoke from Kurt's bad cooking] What the fuck?



    Brian Steadman:
    Simon, ask Kurt how else is he gonna get to school.



    Kurt McKenna:
    Tell Brian I'm gonna use Simon's bike!



    Brian Steadman:
    Remind Kurt that he broke Simon's bike at the weekend.



    Simon Casey:
    [angry] You broke Simon's bike?



    Kurt McKenna:
    Remind Brian he promised not to tell Simon that I'd broken his bike!



    Simon Casey:
    [to Brian] How did he break my bike?



    Kurt McKenna:
    Kurt's not sure.



    Brian Steadman:
    He dropped it.



    Simon Casey:
    [angry] How can you fucking drop it?



    Kurt McKenna:
    Please thank Brian for putting Kurt in the shit!


    [storms off]



    Brian Steadman:
    Tell Kurt that he still hasn't told Brian how he's going to get to school!

  • Clare Hunter:
    I never want to see "for being a mong" in the detention book again.

  • Brian Steadman:
    This has nothing to do with you being fat, which you're not, you're just healthy... in a large way.

  • Kurt McKenna:
    Do you think J.P shagged her?



    Brian Steadman:
    No, he's gay.



    Kurt McKenna:
    Maybe he's bi-sexual?



    Brian Steadman:
    Lucky bastard!



    Kurt McKenna:
    How's that?



    Brian Steadman:
    Coz you can shag anyone!

  • Clare Hunter:
    A spastic is someone with cerebral palsy, not someone who misses an open goal on the football field, Mr Steadman.

  • Susan Gately:
    I'm going to have a baby.



    Kurt McKenna:
    Can't you get the drinks in first?

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