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Quotes of Movie: "Taxi" [1978]

  • "Reverend Jim" Ignatowski:
    Hey, Alex - You know the really great thing about television? If something important happens, anywhere in the world, night or day... you can always change the channel.

  • [during a written driving test]



    "Reverend Jim" Ignatowski:
    Pssssttt... what does the yellow light mean?



    Bobby Wheeler:
    "Slow down."



    "Reverend Jim" Ignatowski:
    What... does... the... yellow... light... mean?



    Bobby Wheeler:
    "Slow down"!



    "Reverend Jim" Ignatowski:
    Whaaaat... dooooeeees... theeeee... yeeeel-looowwww... liiiiight... meeeeaaan?

  • [while filling out an application]



    Bobby Wheeler:
    Mental illness or narcotic addiction?



    "Reverend Jim" Ignatowski:
    Now that's a tough choice...

  • Alex Rieger:
    One thing about being a cabbie is that you don't have to worry about being fired from a good job.

  • Jim:
    When I think of me, I smile.

  • Louie De Palma:
    Whenever I hear the word "marriage," I say, "Check, please!"

  • [Latka pays Louie a coin]



    Louie De Palma:
    What's this?



    Latka Gravas:
    It's a kebble.



    Louie De Palma:
    What's a kebble?



    Latka Gravas:
    110 kebble make a lithnitch.



    Louie De Palma:
    What's a lithnich?



    Latka Gravas:
    270 lithnich make a matta.



    Louie De Palma:
    What's a matta?



    Latka Gravas:
    I don't know, what's the matter with you?

  • Louie De Palma:
    Do you know what the difference is between people like you and people like me, Nardo?



    Alex Rieger:
    Yeah, two million years of evolution.

  • "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    If you find yourself in a confusing situation, simply laugh knowingly and walk away.

  • Louie De Palma:
    I know what love is cuz I watch talk shows. Love is the end of happiness!

  • [filling out a form]



    "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    Eyes...



    Elaine Nardo:
    No, don't put two.



    "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    Oh, they mean color, don't they?

  • Alex Rieger:
    Why'd you change your name to Ignatowski?



    "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    Try saying it backwards.



    Bobby Wheeler:
    Ix-wah-tangy.



    "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    That's nowhere near Starchild, is it?

  • Alex Rieger:
    I'm not really a cab driver. I'm just waiting for something better to come along. You know, like death.

  • Bobby Wheeler:
    We were wondering if you would join us for a few minutes?



    "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    Well, what did you decide?

  • "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    You know, you really need to clean up those bathrooms.



    Alex Rieger:
    You just came from the kitchen.



    "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    Thank God.

  • Alex Rieger:
    Jim, when are you finally going to have some pride and stand up for yourself?



    "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    August!

  • Louie De Palma:
    Get that ugly, flea-ridden, stinking animal out of my garage, and tell him to take his horse with him!

  • "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    What did you win that trophy for?



    Alex Rieger:
    For making a fool of myself.



    "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    Why doesn't anyone tell me about contests like that?

  • [On boxing]



    "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    The ability to witness two men stand toe to toe in the spirit of sportsmanship and pummel each other into insensibility is what separates us from the animals.

  • Louie De Palma:
    Ignatowski's got a father? There goes my spore theory!

  • Louie De Palma:
    Hey, Bobby, I hope someone slams a door on your face, you sneeze, and your head explodes.

  • Elaine Nardo:
    Poor Emily. It's so sad that she mixed drugs and alcohol and spent the night with you... when most people only die.

  • Monica Banta:
    You must be Louie.



    Louie De Palma:
    How did you know my name?



    Monica Banta:
    I only had three people described to me. One was smart, one was good-looking, and one was you.

  • Alex Rieger:
    We're arguing because we care too much, and we're breaking up because we don't care enough.

  • "Reverend" Jim Ignatowski:
    I wonder about things, like, if they call an orange an "orange," then why don't we call a banana a "yellow" or an apple a "red"? Blueberries, I understand. But will someone explain gooseberries to me?

    • Movie: "Taxi" [1978] | [2]
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