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Quotes of Movie: "Spin City" [1996]

  • Nikki:
    [on the phone] I'm sorry I scared you mother. It was a simple, run-of-the-mill orgasm.

  • [a woman is making a pass at Carter]



    Carter:
    Your heterosexual powers have no effect on me.

  • Roberta:
    Mr. Mayor, would you consider marching in the Gay Pride Parade this week?



    Mayor Winston:
    What, are you drunk?

  • Mike:
    There are 10 commandments. I'd like your dates to check out on at least 7 of them.

  • Ashley:
    We shouldn't have culturally insensitive sex.

  • Carter:
    If the Deputy Mayor speaks in his office, and there are no cameras to hear, does he make a sound?

  • Nikki:
    Oh, Stuart, one day you're going to make some woman very, very unhappy.

  • Mike:
    Look at Dick Clark. Not a grey hair on his head and he's as popular now as he was 100 years ago.

  • Mike:
    My grandmother thought that a homosexual was a person who slept with one person their whole life. We were gonna let it slide but she kept telling the mailman she was a homosexual.

  • Mike:
    Now, I don't want to hear any excuses.



    Stuart:
    You sure? 'Cause I've been saving the doozy. It starts out as an excuse but I end up blaming James.

  • Mike:
    Anybody read this? Bingo died.



    Karen:
    Ohh! Who's Bingo?



    Mike:
    Only the city's most decorated police dog.



    Nikki:
    Oh, yeah, right. He pulled that drowning kid out of the reservoir.



    James:
    And didn't he sniff out 10 kilos of cocaine at La Guardia?



    Mike:
    Yeah. Poor little guy didn't sleep for weeks after that.

  • Paul:
    You know, I've been allergic to cats all my life, but at the pet morgue, nothing. Turns out I'm not allergic to dead cats.



    Carter:
    Then you should definitely get one.

  • Holly:
    I don't have the patience to ask you again. Leave me alone or I'll have you terminated.



    Stuart:
    You can't fire me.



    Holly:
    I meant killed.

  • Mike:
    I had sex with this woman, Kevin. And she wants to get pregnant. She kidnapped my "guys"! And she put them in the freezer!



    Kevin:
    That old story.

  • [after Carter's dog electrocuted himself by licking a lamp socket]



    Mike:
    That had to hurt.

  • [On erections]



    Nikki:
    Can't you guys control those things?



    Stuart:
    Not always.



    Mike:
    You can scold it, or smack it around a little bit. That only seems to encourage it.



    Nikki:
    I am fascinated.



    James:
    Sometimes all it takes is a thought, memory... sometimes all it takes is a slight breeze.

  • Drew West:
    So, Randy... what's your favorite sexual position?



    Mayor Winston:
    Well, that's really not any of your business. However, I hear yours is "Man on top, woman in magazine."

  • Mayor Winston:
    Are you sure this is the best title for my autobiography? "Winston On Winston"?



    Mike:
    Hey, as long there aren't two guys on the cover, I think we're okay.

  • Stuart:
    Big 3-0, huh? It's the perfect age. You can date college girls *and* their mothers.

  • Mike:
    As my assistant, occasionally you may need to assist me.

  • Stuart:
    I remember the first time I got mugged. It was by a woman. She came up to me, made small talk, put her hand in my pocket, and made off with my wallet.



    James:
    That's horrible!



    Stuart:
    I've paid more to get less.

  • Stuart:
    If that woman ever shows her face again, I will unleash a punishment upon her she cannot even fathom.



    Carter:
    What are you gonna do? You gonna date her?

  • James:
    Each year my mom makes a candy Nativity scene.


    [Carter walks by]



    James:
    Chocolate Jesus.



    Carter:
    James, at work, just call me Carter.

  • Stuart:
    Oh take it outta hyper-gay!

  • Mayor Winston:
    I am not a child, and I *will not* be treated like one!



    Charlie:
    Sir, you forgot your shoes.



    Mayor Winston:
    I don't care.

    • Movie: "Spin City" [1996] | [2] | [3]
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