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Quotes of Movie: "Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In" [19

  • Dan Rowan:
    [as the News of the Future anchor] Item: Washington, DC, 1988. President Ronald Reagan today denied once again that he is a candidate for the office of Governor of California.

  • Judy Carne:
    I don't think Mr. Nixon will stand still for a Sock it to me.



    Richard Nixon:
    Sock it to me?

  • [catchphrase]



    Jo Anne:
    IS THAT A CHICKEN JOKE?

  • [catchphrase]



    German Soldier:
    Verrry eenteresting...

  • Tim Conway:
    Y'know, my wife just doesn't understand me.



    Eileen:
    Oh, you married men are all the same.



    Tim Conway:
    No, I mean it. She doesn't understand me. She's Swahili.

  • Tim Conway:
    Well, if your heart belongs to me, how can the rest of you go out with so many other guys?

  • [repeated line]



    Dan Rowan:
    Go to your room!

  • [repeated line]



    Judy Carne:
    You're weird, Goldie.

  • [repeated line]



    Judy Carne:
    It's not fair.


    [after getting doused with a bucket of water]

  • Tyrone F. Horneigh:
    Would you like to go to a play?


    [Gladys hits him]



    Tyrone F. Horneigh:
    Would you like to go to a concert?


    [Gladys hits him]



    Tyrone F. Horneigh:
    Would you like to go to a funeral?


    [falls off the park bench]

  • Cher:
    Sonny and I are perfectly compatible. As soon as there's a problem, my psychiatrist contacts his psychiatrist and they work it out.

  • Jo Anne:
    Boris says we'll never win the War on Poverty till all those poor people surrender.

  • Jo Anne:
    Boris and I have the most violent political arguments. He thinks the Democrats can do no wrong, and, of course, I'm for Johnson.

  • Dick Martin:
    How about coming up to my place?



    Girl:
    Are you going to try anything fresh?



    Dick Martin:
    Nope. Same old stuff.

  • [repeated line]



    Dan Rowan:
    Look THAT up in your Funk and Wagnall's.

  • Dan Rowan:
    Now here's the man for whom the news wouldn't be the news without the news, Heeeere's Dicky.

  • Dick Martin:
    You bet your sweet bippy.

  • Tyrone F. Horneigh:
    Do you believe in love at first sight?


    [Gladys hits him]



    Tyrone F. Horneigh:
    Do you believe in two hearts intertwining to become one?


    [Gladys hits him]



    Tyrone F. Horneigh:
    Do you believe in mouth-to-mouth resucitation?


    [He falls over]

  • [poem]



    John Wayne:
    The sky is blue. The grass is green. Get off you butts and join the Marines.

  • Ernestine, the telephone operator:
    One ringy-dingy. Two ringy-dingies.

  • Alan Sues:
    Oh, good heavens. Someone's copped my tinkle.

  • Ernestine, the telephone operator:
    And as a special favor, I'm enclosing our three-color brochure on phone etiquette. You might find it useful.

  • Announcer:
    The preceding was recorded earlier because we were ashamed to do it now.

  • Dinah Shore:
    If Ida Lupino married Don Ho she'd be Ida Ho.

  • Ernestine, the telephone operator:
    How may I, in all humble servitude, be of assistance?

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  • Well we'd just seen Gerry. I think he wanted somebody who had that authority and was handsome. The thing is, he's a big hunk isn't he? All I can say, if you look at his chat line, or the Phantom website, it's quite worrying. Because the girls really seem to love him. (Andrew Lloyd Webber)


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  • I'm thinking, this is Robert Redford. You know, he's won an Academy Award, he's talking to me about directing a movie he's in. So you just think that it's Hollywood stuff or whatever (Barry Levinson)