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Quotes of Movie: "Reba" [2001]

  • Cheyenne:
    Kyra, guess what Elisabeth's first word was.



    Kyra:
    Help?

  • Reba:
    Do you know what a teenager is?



    Barbra Jean:
    A demon?

  • Barbra Jean:
    [to Kyra] You bring people together. You're like a little Reverend Al Sharpton.

  • Barbra Jean:
    Maybe next time I'll marry someone who's ex-wife appreciates me!

  • Reba:
    Kyra, what on Earth would make you wanna hit someone?



    Cheyenne:
    It's her way of showing affection.



    Kyra:
    Yeah, that's right. Now why don't you come over here for a little hug.

  • Reba:
    I know what Kyra is doing!



    Brock Hart:
    Like you did with Cheyenne?



    Reba:
    Oh, one time! The one time our daughter gets pregnant and I never hear the end of it!

  • Reba:
    [when Kyra is helping cheer Barbra Jean up after she and Brock separate] You are a beautiful young woman.



    Kyra:
    Or maybe you just raised me right. That and I watch a lot of "7th Heaven".

  • Electrician:
    [to Barbara Jean, about Reba] Wow, your mom's a real grouch.


    [Barbara Jean looks flattered]



    Electrician:
    [pause]



    Barbra Jean:
    I know, right?

  • Reba:
    If Thanksgiving were a concert the turkey would be Cher.

  • Reba:
    If Thanksgiving were a concert, the turkey would be Cher.



    Barbra Jean:
    So, you want to have Thanksgiving here, and you want Cher?



    Reba:
    That's right. I've got turkey, babe!

  • Reba:
    Hey, Jake. What are you watching?



    Jake Hart:
    The Weather Channel. More rain for Brazil.

  • Reba:
    [when Van gets an injury involving his spine and tail bone] It's a mother-in-law's job to make the best of a bad situation.



    Van Montgomery:
    [sarcastically] I thought it was a mother-in-law's job to make butt-jokes about her son-in-law.



    Reba:
    We wear many hats.

  • [Reba is shocked by Barbera Jean's new Reba haircut]



    Barbra Jean:
    So, what do you think? Is it me?



    Reba:
    [furiously] No. It's me!

  • Barbra Jean:
    [in the hospital, after Cheyenne had a false labor, Barbra Jean sits down on a chair] Oh, my God! I think my water just broke!



    Reba:
    Oh no, you're sitting on my purse!

  • Reba:
    Jake Mitchell Hart are you lying to me?



    Jake Hart:
    Yes! No one mocks me and gets away with it!



    Reba:
    So, did that boy even go upstairs?



    Jake Hart:
    No! And I didn't no he was a boy, I thought he was an ugly girl!



    Reba:
    You are in big trouble! no tv, no dessert, and Grandma gets her cell phone back!


    [She takes the gameboy SP back and Jake runs upstairs]

  • Barbra Jean:
    Boop! You've got mail!


    [opens Kyra's laptop and makes poses]



    Reba:
    [to Brock] Boop! You've got a goof-ball!

  • Reba:
    You treat that animal like it can walk on water!



    Barbra Jean:
    What is "dog" spelled backwards reba?


    [conversation about why barbara jean's dog is missing goes on for another 2 minutes]



    Van Montgomery:
    GOD! it spells god.

  • [Van is sleeping, drooling on his sheets. Reba comes in telling him to wake up]



    Van Montgomery:
    Awwww! I was dreaming about waffles!

  • Van Montgomery:
    I'll be with my friends, you'll be with yours. Then we'll hook up later. It'll be just like junior year! Except we're married, you're pregnant, and everything is different.

  • Reba:
    You want me to sign a permission form for bigamy?

  • Reba:
    [reading a card] Oh, no! It says here that Barbara Jean told Buzzard it was okay for him to write me and visit when he's in town!



    Cheyenne:
    Wait, this is Barbara Jean's brother Buzzard; right?



    Reba:
    Cheyenne, I would hate to think that I knew more than one person with the nickname 'Buzzard'.

  • Dolly Majors:
    And you are gonna be the prettiest woman in the office!



    Reba:
    Oh, Second to you!



    Dolly Majors:
    Hey, we're not comparing apples and melon's here.

  • Cheyenne:
    [about Kyra living with Barbra Jean and Brock] She must be making their lives a living nightmare.



    Reba:
    [laughs] I know!


    [Straightens up]



    Reba:
    I mean...


    [firmly]



    Reba:
    I know.

  • [Van laying on the bed because he cant play football Friday night]



    Cheyenne:
    Wanna go to the movies?



    Van Montgomery:
    No.



    Cheyenne:
    Wanna fool around?



    Van Montgomery:
    No.



    Cheyenne:
    Wanna eat some pizza?



    Van Montgomery:
    No.



    Cheyenne:
    [Yells] MOM!

  • [repeted line]



    Reba:
    Crap!

    • Movie: "Reba" [2001]
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