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Quotes of Movie: "Open All Hours" [1976]
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It's a great burden, Granville. Being holier than everybody else. But I enjoy it. Next time you feel desperate for an egg, lad, pause, and remember where it's come from. The world's full of nasty places, Granville. I'll have two dozen ounces of liquorice torpedoes. They'll take your mind away from eggs. I'm not a religious woman, but I find if you say no to everything you can hardly tell the difference. | |
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I wouldn't give tuppence for his kidneys. How much is your boiled ham? What are your meringues like? Arkwright: I'm not telling you till after we're married. So. You're going to Parslow's funeral. Arkwright: Yes. Even though it's very unlikely that he'll ever come to mine. Don't just crit there siticizing! [exasperated at Arkwright's tight-fistedness] You're not going to live forever you know. Arkwright: I'm goin' to have a d-damn good try, aren't you? She has a face like a fit. Arkwright: Aye, but what it would fit, I'll never know. It is like her facial muscles don't know the meaning of the word "teamwork". D'ya know what you need? A good walloping. Nurse Gladys Emmanuel: Oh, yeah and who's gonna give it to me? Arkwright: I? I? I am. Nurse Gladys Emmanuel: Oh, three of you. Oh, you wound me sometimes, Granville! Granville: How? Arkwright: That time I sat on your bicycle clip springs to mind. The nurse will be watching! [about to put a note in the shop till] Do you reckon they can stitch fingers back on these days? I want a w-w-word with you. Granville: That's three words. Arkwright: That girl of Grimshaw's. Granville: Big Edna? Arkwright: Have you been kn-kn-knocking Granville: I have only admired her from a distance. Arkwright: Let me finish. Have you been kn-kn-knocking coppers off her weekly order? Granville: You do the same for Mrs Featherstone. Arkwright: Not without putting them back somewhere else. Scotch broth? That's very exotic. I'm afraid I don't have any in small tins. Only large tins. Mavis: Oh. Arkwright: I can't cut it in half Mavis. It all f-flops out. Tell you what. I'll sell you a large tin but I'll only charge you for two small tins. Oh, so we're giving flowers to the milkwoman's boyfriend now? You won't let me buy firelighters. You say they're too expensive. Arkwright: They are in this damn shop. I'm not paying these prices! Get round the Co-op and buy some. [pause] Arkwright: Go and open a packet. Granville: [leaves the room, to return a few seconds later] Not if they're going to count as my birthday present. My God! There's nothing frightens you more than a furtive grocer. [Granville has just walked into Mrs. Featherstone] Not even my husband used to get that close. Arkwright: [to Granville] Dear God! Where did you catch her? You look all sinister and Hungarian. Granville: Hungarians don't look like this. Arkwright: Badly-dressed Hungarians do. Granville: I look like an idiot. Arkwright: Yes. I hate that scrunching sound errand boys make when you have to stand on them. I'll have a large washing-up liquid. Arkwright: I think I'll join you. Well, there's a great day for discoveries. My mother was the fisherman's friend and I've got a bottom half called Hugo. Well done! And you certainly have been. | |
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