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Quotes of Movie: "Moonlighting" [1985]
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I remember when they told Sylvia Plath, "Hey, Syl, cheer up!" I remember when they told e. e. cummings, "e, baby; use caps!" But did ol' e listen? No. Little n. Little o. And then last night, an idea hit me! Maddie: Left a bruise, I hope. David: Who is the one person out there, who is spreading happiness and joy out there in the world? Maddie: Steven Spielberg? David: SANTY CLAUS! If people are meant to be together, they'll find each other, no matter where, no matter what, right? Isn't that right? Just when I think you've gone as low as you can go, you find a basement door! | |
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You have the morals of rabbit, the character of a slug, and the brain of a platypus. Well, let me remind you Mr. Addison, that one case does not a detective make. David Addison: Well, let me remind you Ms. Hayes, that I HATE IT WHEN YOU TALK BACKWARDS. David, may I please have some ANSWERS? David Addison: Delaware, all of the above, 90 degrees. Do bears bear? Do bees be? That man belongs in a pound. Agnes DiPesto: Pound of what? You can't just burst in here like that. David Addison: Oh yeah? Tell that to the writers. Maddie Hayes: "Exactly"'s all in capital letters. What do you think that means? David Addison: I think it means exactly what it says. Unhand me! David Addison: I'll try, but I don't think they'll come off! Good husband, are we married merrily? David Addison: Yea, verily, we are married merrily... though at first warily, and unfortunately quite sterilely. It is plain the whole town knoweth of the deal 'twixt me and Petruchio. And if the whole town knoweth, then 'tis possible that Kate knoweth. And if Kate knoweth and knoweth that the whole town knoweth and knoweth that we knoweth that she knoweth - knowest what that means? Herbert Viola: No-eth. Wipe that stupid grin off your face. David Addison: This is the smartest grin I know. I'm sorry, but you're not on the guest list. David Addison: That's because we're not guests. We're looking for a man with a mole on his nose. Security Officer: A mole on his nose? Maddie Hayes: A mole on his nose. Security Officer: [to Maddie] What kind of clothes? Maddie Hayes: [to David] What kind of clothes? David Addison: What kind of clothes do you suppose? Security Officer: What kind of clothes do I suppose would be worn by a man with a mole on his nose? Who knows? David Addison: Did I happen to mention, did I bother to disclose, that this man that we're seeking with the mole on his nose? I'm not sure of his clothes or anything else, except he's Chinese, a big clue by itself. Maddie Hayes: How do you do that? David Addison: Gotta read a lot of Dr. Seuss. Security Officer: I'm sorry to say, I'm sad to report, I haven't seen anyone at all of that sort. Not a man who's Chinese with a mole on his nose with some kind of clothes that you can't suppose. So get away from this door and get out of this place, or I'll have to hurt you - put my foot in your face. David, I just don't think... David Addison: [interrupting] That's okay, you look good. You see through me, Kate. No tuner I. But I wish it were within my talents to play piano for you. Kate/Maddie: 'Tis a sad thing indeed. You're the only man I know who suffereth from pianist envy. Stay! Didst I hear, "I come to wive it wealthily in Padua?" Petruchio/Addison: Pray sir, yea sir, I dare say I did say. Lucentio/Viola: Yea sir, you do say you did say? Petruchio/Addison: Yea, I say, but why do you bray? Do not gainsay what I say that we may make headway. I foray this way that I may be home ere midday. Lucentio/Viola: Hooray for this day and the words that you say and forgive my display, but I have something to say. Petruchio/Addison: Then without further delay, I say, fire away! I know who he is, he paints naked girls. Maddie Hayes: Nudes. David Addison: Nudes, right. Nakeds have staples in them. This is him, Edward O'Leary. Recognize him? Maddie Hayes: I don't know, we never knew him. Mortician: Then what did you want to look at the body for? Maddie Hayes: What did we want to look at the body for? David Addison: We're private detectives. It's what we do. Mortician: You wanna look at any others while you're here? Maddie Hayes: No thanks. Our limit is one stiff per day. Maddie Hayes: Addison! You better figure out a way to get me off this train! David Addison: Whoa! Lady, I will gladly get you off this train. I will throw you off this train, if necessary, but kindly refrain from any physical act that is not of an erotic nature. Brian Baker called me names. Preston Holt lied to me. Omar Gaus mocked me. I don't think I like men anymore. David Addison: We still like you. I didn't even know you had a brother. David Addison: Never thought of him as a brother - just mom and dad's science project. Do math majors multiply? Do eggs get laid? | |
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