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Quotes of Movie: "Monk" [2002]
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Adrian Monk: It's a gift... and a curse. Does everything have to make sense, Monk? Adrian Monk: It kinda does. Adrian Monk: Unless I'm wrong, which, you know, I'm not... Adrian Monk: You'll thank me later. | |
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Adrian Monk: Wipe. [to the commisioner] So, you're going to let a murderer off, because you're afraid to admit YOU'RE BALD? [about being a cop] I couldn't change the world, I knew that. But I could fix little pieces of it. [Monk is talking about Sharona, after she thinks that she is having hallucinations] She's not crazy! Lester Highsmith: Is that a water pistol? Adrian Monk: No! [barrel is dripping] Adrian Monk: Maybe... it's scalding! Scalding hot water! A stop sign is not a suggestion! Sharona Fleming: Yes it is! [to Benji] ... and you tell her to call Adrian. He'll know what to do... after I tell him. You know, some people think I'm dangerous. Sharona Fleming: Yeah, people driving behind you. I haven't needed a babysitter since I was nineteen. Sharona Fleming: You needed a babysitter when you were nineteen? Adrian Monk: Everyone did. It was the late Seventies. It was a crazy time. Tell me about the Lobster Barrel. Joe Christie: It's a family place. It's noisy, there's a million kids. You wouldn't last five minutes. It's got a great all-you-can-eat buffet with seven different kinds of shrimp: jumbo shrimp, batter-dipped shrimp, tempura shrimp... Adrian Monk: Okay, stop telling me about the Lobster Barrel. Joe Christie: ...barbecued shrimp... Adrian Monk: Stop. You recently started dating again. Natalie: How did you know that? Adrian Monk: [holds them up] Birth control pills. [Natalie's young daughter is staring at them] Natalie: [horrified] What's wrong with you? Adrian Monk: My mistake. These are Tic-Tacs. [walking through a Museum exhibit on "The Miracle of Birth"] Come on, Adrian, it's just like a fun house. Adrian Monk: What's so fun about fallopian tubes? I don't even know this woman. What would my hours be? Adrian Monk: 9 am. Housekeeper: Until? Adrian Monk: Until one. Housekeeper: Until 1 pm? Adrian Monk: Until one of us dies. She's been buying ice all day. That makes sixteen bags she's carried in so far. Natalie: Maybe she's having a party. Adrian Monk: No food, no beer, no chips. Just ice. Capt. Stottlemeyer: Maybe she's having an Adrian Monk party. Captain, I'm one-hundred percent sure that she probably killed him. Capt. Stottlemeyer: What does that mean? [pause] Adrian Monk: Ninety-five percent. There's an old saying: "Don't change anything... ever." Natalie Teeger: That's an old saying? Adrian Monk: I've been saying it for years. What are you doing? Natalie: Pokin' around. Adrian Monk: You can't *do* that! Natalie: I can do anything I want. I'm cute. Adrian Monk: Is your seatbelt on? Sgt. Parnell: Yes, it is. Adrian Monk: Nice and tight? Blinkers! Blinkers! Sgt. Parnell: Do you understand this is a car chase? Adrian Monk: Left lane ends, two miles! Left lane ends, two miles! I mean, he could do alot worse than me for a father. What if he were adopted by... wolves? [after accidentally touching the ground] Nature! I've got Nature on my hand! Get it off! | |
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