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  • Quotes: 124892
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  • Proverbs: 1023
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Quotes of Movie: "Attention Scum" [2001]

  • The League Against Tedium:
    What to say after sex? "Thank you," seems like too much. "I'm sorry," too little.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    I remember when I posed as a customs officer to meet Oscar Wilde. "Have you anything to declare?" I enquired. "I have nothing to declare but my genius," he replied. "I shall put that down as 'nothing', then, shall I?" I said. For I am the wittiest man on Earth bar none, and have two sharp fists to prove it.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    And you say, "He who lives by the sword shall die by the sword." O indeed so! Likewise he who lives by the pen, or by the fax machine, or by the word processor - all shall die by the sword! Only he who lives by the tank shall remain immune.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    My dog has no legs but he still chews bones. How does a dog with no legs chew bones? With a great deal of suspicion, I notice.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    "The pen is mightier than the sword," you claim. I shall meet you at dawn tomorrow in Hyde Park. Bring your pens and prepare to have your logic tested by steel.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    "Cleanliness is next to godliness," you claim. Indeed. And the chip shop is next to the hairdresser's. It does not persuade me to visit either.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    A fool and his money are easily parted, but they often retain their hair well into their fifties.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    "The poor are always with us." Thus speaks the man who hath not learnt to use a whip correctly.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    And I say thus: "All the world's a stage, its inhabitants merely actors. And thus, by definition, ponces."

  • The League Against Tedium:
    It is said that at the age of 50 each man becomes what he most despised at the age of 25, and I live in constant fear lest I become a badly organised coach trip to Bournemouth.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    The wise man picks his friends from a hat. The truly wise man picks the hat.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    Admire wealthy people. They will not suspect your motives.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched," you assert. I say count them! And then dismiss them for what they are: chickens. Merely chickens.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    Greatness sits upon my shoulders just as a dog urinates upon the pavement. That is, with naturalness and ease, and some offence to the casual observer.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    Question: What is the greatest crime of the 20th century? Answer: Birmingham. And it's growing.

  • The League Against Tedium:
    Art gallery? spare me talk of you "art galleries". What need have I of paintings when I possess several high quality mirrors?

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  • Being the first to cross the finish line makes you a winner in only one phase of life. It's what you do after you cross the line that really counts. (Ralph Boston)


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  • If that's the first record you've made and you get all this attention, you just assume that's always going to be like that. (Natalie Imbruglia) [attention]