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Quotes of Movie: "As the World Turns" [1956]

  • Barbara:
    I can't call him because he's in a coma!



    Julia Lindsey Snyder:
    A coma? Come on, Barbara. Come up with something a little more original. How about - oh, I know. How about a hole opened up, and James fell into the center of the earth?

  • [Aaron and Alison discuss their marriage]



    Aaron:
    Alison, we've been through a fire in a barn. We've run from the cops. We've been in jail. Come on, compared to that, what's marriage? Gotta be a piece of cake.

  • Paul:
    That woman is unbelievable. She's awesome. She knows exactly what I want her to do, and she does it before I even ask her to do it.



    Henry:
    I had a woman like that once. Once was all I could afford.

  • Aaron:
    Talking to Alison is like trying to nail Jello to a tree.

  • Aaron:
    Ali, listen, listen. Before we do anything crazy, just explain to me what this part means, okay? "Where fowl reigns supreme and lambs dare not roam and pigs in a blanket say take me home."



    Alison:
    Okay, fowl - that's like chickens and roosters and stuff, right? Okay, and "tuck in but don't let sleeping dogs lie".



    Aaron:
    Ali?



    Alison:
    Shh, I'm about to be brilliant. I got it. The key. The key's is in the buns.



    Aaron:
    Excuse me?



    Alison:
    "Tucked in", get it? The way that you tuck a hotdog inside the bread? I need to buy your buns.

  • Henry Coleman:
    [Looking through the Hughes' refrigerator] Give it a few weeks. I've got to tell you something, I've got some irons in the fire. My ship is coming in. I can see a silver lining in that cloud that's been hanging over me for so long. I'm all out of clichés, baby. But I think you get my drift, don't you?



    Maddie Coleman:
    Yes I do. But I don't think you understand the urgency of my plight.



    Henry Coleman:
    A-ha!


    [pulls out a bottle and looks at the lable]



    Henry Coleman:
    Creme de menthe? Oh Lord, who are these people, mad?



    Maddie Coleman:
    Please, please, please. I can not bear it any longer, okay. Okay, all right, I will let you - I give you permission to use a little of that money from B.J. Henry, we can share a place. You can use it and we can share a place.



    Henry Coleman:
    That money - that money's off limits for now, okay?



    Maddie Coleman:
    You're right. I shouldn't even mentioned - what was I thinking?



    Henry Coleman:
    I don't know. Shame on you, shame on you.


    [takes a drink and spits it out]



    Henry Coleman:
    Oh God! What am I supposed to drink this or gargle with it?



    Maddie Coleman:
    What am I supposed to do?



    Henry Coleman:
    Why don't you try making up with Casey? What the hell?


    [takes another sip]



    Maddie Coleman:
    I would rather stick my head in a lion's mouth. Are you still gonna drink that?



    Henry Coleman:
    Yes! It's that bad, huh? Listen, for every problem there is a solution.



    Maddie Coleman:
    You sound like my calculus teacher.

  • Gwen Norbeck:
    Judge Steve?



    Will Munson #4:
    Dude, just tell us.



    Judge Steve Colby:
    You may well hate my guts in ten years.



    Gwen Norbeck:
    Why?



    Judge Steve Colby:
    Because you'll be having your 10th wedding anniversary before you're 30.



    Will Munson #4:
    Yes!



    Judge Steve Colby:
    Or you'll be bitter and divorced a half-decade ahead of schedule. And don't send me a card if that's the last one.

  • Detective Margo Montgomery Hughes #3:
    Will you keep your pants on when you're alone with Maddie?



    Casey Hughes #5:
    I can't believe you said that!



    Detective Margo Montgomery Hughes #3:
    All right, come on, it freaks me out, too.



    Casey Hughes #5:
    You're my mom! I'm your impressionable teenage son! Geez!



    Detective Margo Montgomery Hughes #3:
    Well, look, I finally got more than one word out of you.

  • Barbara:
    A shame to waste good vodka, Barbara.



    Henry Coleman:
    Somehow I think it won't go to waste.

  • Emily Stewart:
    My entire life, honestly - men. My father, Tom, Paul - none of them ever wanted me.



    Henry Coleman:
    There's still good ol' Hal...



    Emily Stewart:
    Yeah, Hal - I came in second to a warm doughnut, Henry.

  • Emily Stewart:
    Face it, Emily. Shooting your fiance is a definite turnoff.



    Henry Coleman:
    Yeah, you know what? One would think, but obviously not.

  • Carly Snyder:
    I'm surprised, I'm surprised after having one your Mom didn't stop right there. What was she thinking?



    Henry Coleman:
    She wasn't thinking, she was weighing the odds. You know, this horse, that horse. Mater had a bit of a gambling problem.



    Carly Snyder:
    She hung out at the track?



    Henry Coleman:
    All day, every day. If you're a thoroughbred you get her attention, but if you're just some mutt on two legs... you know.

  • Emily Stewart:
    Well, she seems like a great kid.



    Henry Coleman:
    She's a smart kid, Emily, and she sees right through you like cheap cellophane. Now, I do not have a dark side, and I don't want to be any part of yours. If you want to put out a hit out on Meg, you call the mob. And if you ever reveal any of your twisted schemes in front of my little sister again, I will call the mob myself.

  • Maddie Coleman:
    She's gone? Henry, are you having an affair?



    Henry Coleman:
    With Emily Stewart?



    Maddie Coleman:
    You know, you can tell me if you two are.



    Henry Coleman:
    Not.



    Maddie Coleman:
    Good. I don't really like her.



    Henry Coleman:
    She has that effect on people.



    Maddie Coleman:
    But I do think she has the hots for you.



    Henry Coleman:
    She does not have the hots for me. She has her talons dug into some other poor slob.



    Maddie Coleman:
    Really?



    Henry Coleman:
    Yeah. She's crazy about him. Literally. It couldn't happen to a nicer guy.

  • Kevin Davis:
    Now, aren't you supposed to be at home carving up some helpless squash, anyway?



    Luke Snyder:
    That's Thanksgiving, genius.

  • Meg Snyder #2:
    And while you're at it, you'll get yourself out of jail?



    Paul Ryan #6:
    I have to. I know that orange is the new black, but those jumpsuits make my butt look enormous.



    Meg Snyder #2:
    I don't know, your butt looks pretty good to me.

  • Barbara:
    Hello, Gwen.



    Gwen Norbeck:
    Oh, great. Great. Just what I need first thing in the morning.

  • Dr. Susan Stewart:
    Oh, sorry, sorry. I was out yesterday because of the stupid wedding and I had to stop by the hospital.



    Barbara Ryan:
    What wedding?



    Dr. Susan Stewart:
    Oh, that's right, you weren't invited. Your son married my daughter.



    Barbara Ryan:
    What? That's impossible. Paul's still in jail.



    Dr. Susan Stewart:
    They got married in the cell. It was everything a mother could hope for, cement floors, iron bars, armed guards, and a son-in-law who's a murderer.

  • Barbara:
    I can't call him because he's in a coma!



    Julia Lindsey Snyder:
    A coma? Come on, Barbara. Come up with something a little more original. How about - oh, I know. How about a hole opened up, and James fell into the center of the earth?

  • [Aaron and Alison discuss their marriage]



    Aaron:
    Alison, we've been through a fire in a barn. We've run from the cops. We've been in jail. Come on, compared to that, what's marriage? Gotta be a piece of cake.

  • Paul:
    That woman is unbelievable. She's awesome. She knows exactly what I want her to do, and she does it before I even ask her to do it.



    Henry:
    I had a woman like that once. Once was all I could afford.

  • Aaron:
    Talking to Alison is like trying to nail Jello to a tree.

  • Aaron:
    Ali, listen, listen. Before we do anything crazy, just explain to me what this part means, okay? "Where fowl reigns supreme and lambs dare not roam and pigs in a blanket say take me home."



    Alison:
    Okay, fowl - that's like chickens and roosters and stuff, right? Okay, and "tuck in but don't let sleeping dogs lie".



    Aaron:
    Ali?



    Alison:
    Shh, I'm about to be brilliant. I got it. The key. The key's is in the buns.



    Aaron:
    Excuse me?



    Alison:
    "Tucked in", get it? The way that you tuck a hotdog inside the bread? I need to buy your buns.

  • Henry Coleman:
    [Looking through the Hughes' refrigerator] Give it a few weeks. I've got to tell you something, I've got some irons in the fire. My ship is coming in. I can see a silver lining in that cloud that's been hanging over me for so long. I'm all out of clichés, baby. But I think you get my drift, don't you?



    Maddie Coleman:
    Yes I do. But I don't think you understand the urgency of my plight.



    Henry Coleman:
    A-ha!


    [pulls out a bottle and looks at the lable]



    Henry Coleman:
    Creme de menthe? Oh Lord, who are these people, mad?



    Maddie Coleman:
    Please, please, please. I can not bear it any longer, okay. Okay, all right, I will let you - I give you permission to use a little of that money from B.J. Henry, we can share a place. You can use it and we can share a place.



    Henry Coleman:
    That money - that money's off limits for now, okay?



    Maddie Coleman:
    You're right. I shouldn't even mentioned - what was I thinking?



    Henry Coleman:
    I don't know. Shame on you, shame on you.


    [takes a drink and spits it out]



    Henry Coleman:
    Oh God! What am I supposed to drink this or gargle with it?



    Maddie Coleman:
    What am I supposed to do?



    Henry Coleman:
    Why don't you try making up with Casey? What the hell?


    [takes another sip]



    Maddie Coleman:
    I would rather stick my head in a lion's mouth. Are you still gonna drink that?



    Henry Coleman:
    Yes! It's that bad, huh? Listen, for every problem there is a solution.



    Maddie Coleman:
    You sound like my calculus teacher.

  • Gwen Norbeck:
    Judge Steve?



    Will Munson #4:
    Dude, just tell us.



    Judge Steve Colby:
    You may well hate my guts in ten years.



    Gwen Norbeck:
    Why?



    Judge Steve Colby:
    Because you'll be having your 10th wedding anniversary before you're 30.



    Will Munson #4:
    Yes!



    Judge Steve Colby:
    Or you'll be bitter and divorced a half-decade ahead of schedule. And don't send me a card if that's the last one.

    • Movie: "As the World Turns" [1956]
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