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Quotes of Cartoons; Shrek [2001] (Usa)

  • Donkey: Aright, nobody move. I've got a dragon and I'm not afraid to use it.
    [gasps from villagers and guards in the church]
    Donkey: I'm a donkey on the edge. (unknown)
  • Lord Farquaad: Now really, it's rude enough being alive when no one wants you, but showing up uninvited to a wedding? (unknown)
  • Princess Fiona: I wanted to show you before.
    Shrek: Well, er, *that* explains a lot. (unknown)
  • Donkey: You love this woman, don't ya?
    Shrek: Yes.
    Donkey: Do you wanna hold her?
    Shrek: Yes.
    Donkey: Please her?
    Shrek: Yes.
    Donkey: Then ya gotta, gotta try a little *tenderness*! Chicks love that romantic crap. (unknown)
  • The Donkey: Stop it, nobody likes a kiss-ass. (unknown)
  • The Donkey: C'mon, princess, you're not that ugly. All right, you are ugly. But you're only like this at night. Shrek's ugly 24/7. (unknown)
  • Princess Fiona: By night one way, by day another / This shall be the norm / Until you find true love's first kiss / Then... take love's true form. (unknown)
  • The Donkey: Oh man. I can't feel my toes.
    The Donkey: I don't have any toes.
    The Donkey: I think I need a hug. (unknown)
  • Donkey: Blue flower, red thorns. Blue flower, red thorns. Blue flower, red thorns. This would be so much easier if I wasn't COLOR-BLIND. (unknown)
  • Donkey: Don't die, Shrek. And if you see any long tunnels, stay away from the light. (unknown)
  • Princess Fiona: Well, when one lives alone, one has to learns these things in case there's...
    [points]
    Princess Fiona: THERE'S AN ARROW IN YOUR BUTT.
    Shrek: What?
    [looks at arrow]
    Shrek: Oh, would you look at that. (unknown)
  • Shrek: Hold the phone. (unknown)
  • The Donkey: Shrek.
    Shrek: What? It's a compliment. Better out than in, I always say.
    The Donkey: But that's no way to behave in front of a princess.
    [Fiona burps louder]
    Princess Fiona: Thanks.
    The Donkey: [to Shrek] She's as nasty as you are. (unknown)
  • The Donkey: So, uh, are there any donkeys up there?
    Shrek: Well, there's, um, Gabby, the Small and Annoying.
    The Donkey: Okay, okay, I see it now. The big shiny one, right there. That one there?
    Shrek: That's the moon.
    The Donkey: Oh, okay. (unknown)
  • Donkey: You cut me deep, Shrek. You cut me real deep just now. (unknown)
  • Princess Fiona: The battle is won. You may remove your helmet, good Sir Knight.
    Shrek: Uh, no.
    Princess Fiona: Why not?
    Shrek: I have helmet hair.
    Princess Fiona: Please. I would'st look upon the face of my rescuer.
    Shrek: Oh, no, you wouldn't... tst.
    Princess Fiona: But... how will you kiss me?
    Shrek: What? That wasn't in the job description.
    The Donkey: Maybe it's a perk. (unknown)
  • The Donkey: All right, I hope you heard that? She called me a "noble steed." She thinks I'm a steed. (unknown)
  • Donkey: Hi, princess.
    Princess Fiona: It talks.
    Shrek: Yeah, but it's getting him to shut up that's the trick. (unknown)
  • Princess Fiona: What kind of a knight are you?
    Shrek: One of a kind. (unknown)
  • Princess Fiona: You didn't slay the dragon?
    Shrek: It's on my "to do" list. Now come on.
    Princess Fiona: But this isn't right. You're meant to charge in, sword drawn, banner flying-that's what all the other knights did.
    Shrek: Yeah, right before they burst into flame. (unknown)
  • Princess Fiona: What are you doing? You know, you should sweep me off my feet out yonder window and down a rope onto your valiant steed.
    Shrek: You've had a lot of time to plan this, haven't you? (unknown)
  • Donkey: Why of course you're a girl dragon. You're just reeking of feminine beauty... hey, what's the matter wit you, you got somethin' in your eye? (unknown)
  • Donkey: Oh, what large teeth you have. I mean white sparkly teeth, I know you probably hear this all the time from your food but you must bleach or something, 'cause that's one dazzling smile you got there and do I detect a hint of minty freshness? (unknown)
  • Donkey: Don't mess wit' me. I'm the Stair Master. I've Mastered the Stairs. I wish I had a step right here, I could step here and here and here and step all over it. (unknown)
  • Shrek: Go over there and see if you can find any stairs.
    Donkey: Stairs? I thought we was lookin' for the Princess.
    Shrek: The Princess will be up the stairs in the highest room in the tallest tower.
    Donkey: How do you know that?
    Shrek: I read it in a book once. (unknown)
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