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Quotes of Cartoons; Hercules [1997]

  • [seeing Hercules hiding from fans behind a curtain]
    Meg: Let's see. What could be behind curtain number one? (unknown)
  • [after Hercules is mobbed by fan girls]
    Meg: It's all right. The sea of raging hormones has ebbed. (unknown)
  • Pain, Panic: [disguised as kids trapped in a rockslide] Somebody call IX-I-I. (unknown)
  • Phil: [running behind Hercules] I'm right behind ya, kid.
    Phil: [lagging after, panting] Whoo. I'm way behind ya, kid. I got a fur wedgie. (unknown)
  • [Pegasus blows the flames off Hades' head]
    Hades: Whoa. Is my hair out? (unknown)
  • Hades: [anger rising] I'm about to rearrange the cosmos, and the one *schlemiel* who can louse it up is waltzing around in the woods. (unknown)
  • [Meg encounters a rabbit and a gopher in the woods]
    Meg: Aw, how cute. A couple of rodents lookin' for a theme park.
    Pain: [as rabbit] Who are you callin' a rodent, sister? I'm a bunny.
    Panic: [as chipmunk] A-And I'm his gopher. (unknown)
  • Zeus: Hey, hey, hey. Hold on, kiddo. What's your hurry? After all these years, is that the kind of hello you give your father?
    Young Hercules: F-F-Father?
    Zeus: Didn't know you had a famous father, did you? Surprise. (unknown)
  • Young Hercules: But if I don't become a true hero, I'll never be able to rejoin my father Zeus.
    Phil: Hold it. Zeus is your father, right?
    Young Hercules: Uh-huh.
    Phil: [giggling] Zeus, the big guy. He's your daddy. Ha-ha-ha. Mr Lightning Bolts. "Read me a book, would you, Da-Da?" Ha-ha-ha. Zeus.
    Phil: [mimics Zeus] "Once upon a time...” Ha-ha-ha.
    Young Hercules: It's the truth.
    Phil: Please. (unknown)
  • Meg: Bye-bye, Wonderboy... (unknown)
  • Hades: What d'ya say? It's happy ending time. Everybody's got a little taste of somethin' but me. I got nothin'. I'm - I'm here with nothin'. Anybody listenin'? It's like I'm - What am I, an echo or something? Hello? Hello? Am I talking to, what, hyperspace? Hello, it's me. Nobody listens. (unknown)
  • Calliope: From that day forward, our boy Hercules could do no wrong. He was so hot, steam looked cool. (unknown)
  • Phil: Rein it in, rookie. You can get away with mistakes like those in the minor decathalons, but this is the big leagues. (unknown)
  • The Fates: In 18 years precisely / The planets will align ever so nicely.
    Hades: Ay, verse. Oy.
    The Fates: The time to act will be at hand / Unleash the Titans, your monstrous band.
    Hades: Mmm-hmm. Good, good.
    The Fates: Then the once-proud Zeus will finally fall / And you, Hades, will rule all.
    Hades: Yes. Hades rules.
    The Fates: A word of caution to this tale.
    Hades: Excuse me?
    The Fates: Should Hercules fight, you will fail.
    Hades: [shouting at the top of his lungs] What?
    Hades: [calm] Okay, fine, fine. I'm cool. I'm fine. (unknown)
  • Young Hercules: I need your help. I want to become a hero, a true hero.
    Phil: Sorry, kid. Can't help ya.
    Young Hercules: Wait.
    [Hercules rips out the door trying to open it]
    Young Hercules: Uh, sorry. Why not?
    Phil: Two words: I am retired. (unknown)
  • Hades: Meg, my little flower, my little bird, my little *nut*-Meg. What exactly happened here? I thought you were gonna persuade the river guardian to join my team for the uprising and here I am sort of... river-guardian-less.
    Meg: Look, I gave it my best shot, but he made me an offer I had to refuse. (unknown)
  • Hades: My favorite part of the game - sudden death. (unknown)
  • Hades: [Hercules and the Hydra are fighting, and the Hydra is winning, while Hades watches] Now, for my favorite part of the game - sudden death. (unknown)
  • Phil: Kid, kid, kid. How many horns do you see?
    Hercules: Six?
    Phil: Ah, close enough. Let's get you cleaned up. (unknown)
  • Hades: Brothers. Titans. Look at you in your squalid prison. Who put you down there?
    Titans: Zeus.
    Hades: And now that I set you free, what is the first thing you are going to do?
    Titans: Destroy him.
    Hades: Good answer. (unknown)
  • Phil: Nymphs, they can't get their hands off me. (unknown)
  • Hades: Guys, get your titanic rears in gear and kick some Olympian butt. (unknown)
  • Hades: Well, gotta blaze. I have a whole cosmos up there waiting for me... with, hey, my name on it. (unknown)
  • Zeus: I need more thunderbolts.
    Hermes: Hephaestus has been captured, my lord. Everyone's been captured.
    [Hermes is dragged away by Pain and Panic]
    Hermes: I've been captured. Whoa. Hey, watch the glasses. (unknown)
  • Hades: Pain. Panic. Got a little riddle for ya. How do you kill a god?
    Pain: [sounds assertive at first] I do not... know.
    Panic: You can't... they're immortal?
    Hades: Bingo, they're immortal. So the first thing we gotta do is make the little sunspot... mortal. (unknown)
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