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Quotes of Boris Movie: Abbott and Costello Meet the Killer

  • [the Swami tries to get a hypnotized Freddie to kill himself]



    Swami Talpur:
    Perhaps you should choose the manner of your death. How would you like to die?



    Freddie Phillips:
    Old age.

  • Swami Talpur:
    [to Freddie] You're going to commit suicide if it's the last thing you do!

  • Freddie Phillips:
    It's a booby trap.



    Casey Edwards:
    For what?



    Freddie Phillips:
    For boobs.

  • Freddie Phillips:
    [upon escaping a steambox] I saw a hand turn around the corner, and he put on a lot of steam, all the steam he could put on, f-full force... I think somebody's trying to kill me.

  • Freddie Phillips:
    Who's the culprit?



    Casey Edwards:
    The culprit and the murderer are the same!

  • Swami Talpur:
    [to Freddie in a hypnotic voice] You didn't see me... you didn't see me... you didn't see me... I wasn't here


    [leaves]



    Casey Edwards:
    [to Freddy] Ready to go?



    Freddie Phillips:
    I didn't see him.



    Casey Edwards:
    You didn't see who?



    Freddie Phillips:
    The man who wasn't here.



    Casey Edwards:
    What man?



    Freddie Phillips:
    All I did was open up the door, see if the coast was clear, my mind went blank.



    Casey Edwards:
    Your mind's been a blank all your life.

  • Freddie Phillips:
    I have a confession to make.



    Angela Gordon:
    You did it?



    Freddie Phillips:
    No, I mean that stuff


    [champagne]



    Freddie Phillips:
    I don't drink that stuff, that's like drinking poison.



    Angela Gordon:
    Oh come on...



    Freddie Phillips:
    Oh stop it, the bubbles' is tickling my nose.



    Angela Gordon:
    For little Angela...



    Freddie Phillips:
    I wouldn't drink it for big Angela.

  • Casey Edwards:
    [seeing one of Freddie's booby traps] That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever seen.



    Freddie Phillips:
    Oh yeah? Well let me tell you something, if the murderer comes in here alone, somebody else is gonna carry him out.

  • Abernathy:
    [referring to bridge game] What'd she bid?



    Casey Edwards:
    Grand slam.



    Abernathy:
    [Looking at Freddie's hand] You bid a grand slam on that hand? You know what?



    Freddie Phillips:
    What?



    Abernathy:
    You're going to get murdered.

  • Insp. Wellman:
    Were you and Relia in cahoots?



    Freddie Phillips:
    [having seen Relia's body] The last time I saw Relia, he didn't talk to me.



    Insp. Wellman:
    If I could only find Relia. I could make him talk.



    Freddie Phillips:
    If you could, that would be a good trick.



    Sgt. Stone:
    He could make him talk. You don't know Wellman.



    Freddie Phillips:
    You don't know Relia.

  • Insp. Wellman:
    I'm going to locate Milford and Relia if I have to take this hotel apart with my own hands.

  • Insp. Wellman:
    Someone in this room knows a lot more than he or she is admitting, and I intend to find out who it is.

  • Casey Edwards:
    It's Milford. Strickland's secretary.



    Freddie Phillips:
    What's he hangin' around here for?



    Casey Edwards:
    He's hang - - He's dead, you dope.

  • Abernathy:
    Things have been awfully dead around here.



    Freddie Phillips:
    Much deader than you think.

  • Casey Edwards:
    Freddie, where did you that gun?



    Freddie Phillips:
    I don't know.



    Casey Edwards:
    Freddie, for the last time! Where did you get that gun?



    Freddie Phillips:
    I don't know.



    Casey Edwards:
    Where did you get that gun?



    Freddie Phillips:
    Hey, that's not fair. You said "for the last time". I answered it.

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